Oh Captain, My Captain: Jonathan Toews

chapter 7: the mess we made

Finley's POV:

I rubbed my eyes open and watched the sun stream through the windows of Jonathan's upstairs bedroom. it was at least seven in the morning and I had fallen asleep not four hours ago.

...wait... I thought to myself. I was in Jonathan's room. I leaned up from the bed and looked around. Jonny laid still next to me, his hair was tousled and back bare. a scratch stretched across his left hand. on the other side of the bed was my dress. it laid in a neat pile next to my pumps and a pair of earrings.

Jonathan rolled over on his side and wrapped his arm around my lap. I ran my fingers through his hair and listened as his breathing began to become lighter.

"haven't woken up to this in a long time," he commented. his voice was gruff.

I looked down at his brown eyes staring up at me. the sun was hitting him in a way that made his dark eyes bright. his lips were pursed and his fingers raced up and down my leg lazily. "why did I wake up in your bed, Jon?" I asked.

"well from what I can tell, we did what we swore we were done doing." he explained.

I slid out of the bed and picked his button up from the floor. he got up and followed me out the hall. a pair of boxers hung loosely on his hips as he waddled to the bathroom.

"I'm jumping in the shower. you make coffee. and when I get out and get caffeine in my system we'll talk about it. okay?" he asked.

I nodded in agreement as our lips met violently. I flashed back to last night.

he held me in his arms. it wasn't Jonathan though. Andrew held me close to his body while we swayed to the song playing.

I could feel Jon's jealous gaze burning holes through us. he stood next to a tall red head, a beer bottle gripped tightly in his hand. the president of the charity we were working with talked to him and the girl but he wasn't paying any attention except to the way I was moving.

suddenly, I realized Jonathan wasn't kissing me. he looked down at me and I up at him. we both turned away and went our separate ways.

I walked down the stairs and put a pot of coffee on and started to remember more of what happened.

I remember seeing him for the first time. he walked through the doors of the ballroom with a few of the guys trailing behind him. a powder blue shirt hugged his broad shoulders. he dropped a navy blue jacket on one of the chairs and tied a silver tie around his neck.

I walked over and began to do it for him. "you suck at this, you know?"

"I could've done it," he laughed, "just had to give me a moment or two."

we both smiled. my hand found it's place on his chest as he looked me up and down.

"you're so-" he paused, "I can't even begin to describe you. there isn't a word in the English language that amounts," he explained.

"so try French," I challenged him.

"Incroyable," he began. he started to string together words in French. his mouth forming sentences that would make any girl melt.

my heart dropped at the thought of that moment. he knew just how to make me want him.

heavy footsteps came from the stairs and moments later Jonathan appeared. a pair of sweatpants hugged his legs and a und shirt to match. he poured two cups of coffee and handed one to me before jumping onto the counter.

"first things first," he said, "why is there a scratch across my hand?"

I laughed and told him the story of what happened. we both stood in the closet of the ball room, arguing over if we really wanted to be with each other. I remember Andrew's name slipping from my mouth and Jonathan's fist going through the wall.

i looked up at him smiling and nodding, "that sounds about right. i rarely have a temper but when it comes to you, I'll punch anything."

"I've noticed."

he finished off his coffee and ate a mouthful of peanuts before getting down and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"is this what we want?" he asked. "do we want this back? I want you happy and if Shaw makes you happy be with Shaw."

"you make me happy, Jonny, but I'm not getting kicked to the curb again." I argued.

"then no more curbs. if you want me, if you want us then we'll have us!"

i looked back at him and sighed, "then prove it. I'm not basing my life off of if we enjoyed some mistake or not!"

he dropped his arms and looked down at me with pain in his expression, "mistake? this wasn't a mistake. any moment I'm next to you is not a mistake. did we mean for this to happen? no! but Finnely this was not some drunken mistake!"

I looked at him and pressed my hand to his chest. he gripped my waist in his hands and buried his face in my neck.

"don't leave me again," he begged, "please do not walk away again."