After Eleven: Liv & Callum

Chapter 8: Callum

Callum

I take my first unburdened lungful of air in two months. The pitch is done. It went well and we had the figures to back up what we proposed, but even if the firm isn't awarded the contracts, I get to close this season of my life. I can go back home knowing that I did what I needed to do, and continue to improve my marriage.

I smile to myself when I think about being home for all of Annie's nighttime routines, and the pleasure of an unrushed morning. Liv and I are still taking time to separately reflect on our relationship, and I've written her a few letters during this trip. I don't know if she'll ever read them, but carving out time to center myself and really be introspective about my relationship with my wife has given me a degree of clarity about the entire situation.

My musings are interrupted by the voices of my team around me, and I become aware that I've just been staring out of the window of the SUV that we rented for this trip.

"What do you think, Cal?"

"Huh?"

When I look back, I can see Emily and Jaime looking at me expectantly.

"I said," Emily throws back with a sarcastic eye roll, "that we've all earned a night to let loose a little bit. I have a college friend who owns a really nice lounge downtown and she said that we should stop by."

I look at Jaime, who shrugs. "I texted everyone else and they're down. We have plenty of time to head back to the hotel to take a break and then change before we leave, and we have the car through tomorrow so we may as well use it. Can everybody be ready by 8?"

"As long as everyone knows that this won't be a company tab and that we have an early flight tomorrow, that's fine."

When we pull up to the hotel I head over to the bar. If I go to my room I'm going to pass out and I want to write out my notes and impressions on the meeting. There were a few projections that the CXE team asked about and I have thoughts that I didn't touch on during the meeting. I'm going to send them a follow up, as I would with other clients, and offer to expand upon those specific points.

A body lands next to mine at the bar, and I look over to see Jaime veering for the elevator banks and Emily sliding into the seat next to me.

"Need to unwind before tonight?" She asks while waving the bartender over.

"Not yet, I have a few thoughts about the meeting that I want to get down before we leave." I open up my computer to makes notes on the slide deck that we used.

"I really admire how dedicated you are to this, Cal. It's been incredible to be so close to you and to learn from you."

I'm not sure what to do with that statement. Overt compliments have always made me feel a bit awkward.

"Thank you, but I think it's just about finding work that you're motivated to do. I work to live, not the other way around, but I like a job where I can take initiative and get to implement a level of creativity into my work."

Emily turns to the bartender, "Can I get a double gin and tonic and then a double whiskey sour for him? Thanks."

"Oh, I think it's a bit too early for me to be drinking," I say, but the bartender has already moved on to make our drinks.

"You've earned it! And besides, it'll go on my tab. I get what you're saying about work vs. life, but I definitely think that you're a little more work oriented than you think. But that's an amazing quality, some people just don't have the drive to really go after what they want. I think that you and I are similar. We know what we want and we make it happen."

The bartender breaks our eye contact by placing our drinks down, and I use mine as an excuse to look away from Emily. The woman really can be intense, and I never quite know how to handle it.

"Hey, thanks for the drink but I'm getting a bit of a headache so I'm going to head upstairs and rest before we go out. I'll see you down here at 8?"

I gather my laptop and finish my drink because hey why waste a drink that someone is already paying for.

"Sure! I'll be down. If you want to meet up early or start down here just text me." She gets up and hugs me unexpectedly.

I just nod and head to the elevator banks. When I get up to the floor that we're all on I pull out my phone to call Liv.

"So how'd it go?" She answers the phone eagerly and it makes me happy to know that she was probably thinking of me.

"It went well, but I'm ready to never have to worry about it again. If we get the contract it'll be great, but if we don't get it I will still get my life back. I miss you, baby, you and Annie. Do you think that we should try to take a trip soon? I can put in for leave and if you can get away from work, even just a staycation weekend nearby, I'd be over the moon."

I've flopped down on the bed, and I feel like a teenager talking to his crush, except that this woman is my wife and I don't have to drive her home before curfew.

"I think that would be great, actually, and I was going to suggest pretty much the same thing. I'm glad that we got some of this out before you left, but I miss you and I want to continue making our marriage a priority. I don't want to go through this again."

"I agree. Look, I'm going to write down a few meeting notes and then take a nap before we all go out for drinks tonight. Can I call you later?"

"Sure. Who all is going out for drinks?"

"It'll be the whole team. It turns out that Emily has a friend who owns a lounge downtown. No clubbing or bar hopping, just some unwinding."

"Okay. Please just be ... I don't know, aware? I get that you don't see it but I really do think that Emily is doing more than sucking up to her boss."

"And if she were trying more, I would have to be receptive, which I'm not. I get that you see something different but please just trust me. I'll be with Jaime all night and I'll call you when I get back, okay?"

"Alright. I love you."

"Love you, too."

After we hang up I change out of my suit, lay my jeans out for later, and crawl into bed. The call with Liz nags at me a little, not letting me sleep. When I get back we're going to need to add a section to our conversations about trusting me. I've never done something to give Liv an actual reason to be suspicious, and I admit that it's insulting to feel like I'm defending myself to my own wife.

I'm not one of those husbands and we aren't one of those marriages.