Psychosis Of The Dark

Chapter 3

Written by Moon on TikTok as moon_lit_void

The void.

That's what I called it.

The place my mind went to during every horrific moment with her.

The void could be anywhere, anything, anyone I wanted. And never would she be the wiser.

My mother helped create the void, so I guess I should be thankful she gave me anything at all. She was a wretched thing. I remember the smell of her perfume, the feel of her hand on my jaw, her loud shrill voice. I remember the hushed tones she talked to doctors and therapists in, as if I wasn't in the room at all, as if I didn't exist. To her I didn't, to her I was the thing that drove my father away, as if it wasn't her deluded ambitions to be more than we were, to be some big happy family.

My father preferred underage blondes and snorting pills he bought for far too cheap off a kid on a street corner, he preferred the pub to being home with a crying baby, well when I cried. Apparently it's unusual when babies don't cry, apparently I was unusual from the start.

"Miss Knight, he seems perfectly fine. Yes, he has a tendency to drift off but beyond that, I can't seem to place anything wrong."

I could almost feel my mothers mouth open and close trying to figure if she could find a new shrink, a new doctor, someone to lock me away. She couldn't, well not then at least. She found a way right after I turned 16, the year the void became my true home.

"Miss Knight, he shows signs of severe detachment, signs of psychopathy. I would recommend going through a judge at this point, have him placed under residential care. They can test him and see just what he needs to help his brain function. Now psychopathy isn't something that can be cured but it can be managed."

It was as if suddenly the walls caved in, she had done it, found the one doctor not easily blinded by my routine answers, a doctor who gave my mother the ticket she needed.

They locked me away in a hospital, tested me, gave me every test they had. By the end they had stamped me with a red label.

"Severe antisocial personality disorder. Dissociation, avoidance and detachment are prominent."

By the time I was 25 I had realized, in the void anything can be reality, and in reality anything could fall into the void. So I waited, waited for the perfect tug in the darkness to drag into the void, to consume, to hollow out and make my perfect little pet. She was just that tug.

Soon, my little light.

Soon you'll see...

Just how wonderful the void truly can be.