In Love With A Lion

Not The Only One

Mitch's POV

My bed wasn't empty when I fell asleep last night. He was there, holding me and telling me it will all be okay. I can't remember why I was crying, I was to tired to remember. It was always Avi who helped me through the horrible times in my life. *sigh* I love him but if he knew he would never want to be my friend again.

I slowly crept out of bed trying to not wake Avi up. We had a big day ahead of us, we were going to the studio to finish off some recordings for PTX Vol 4. I decided to go get Avi and I some coffee. I got dressed in my White, Blue and Yellow knitted Loewe jumper and some black skinny jeans with my brown Acne Studios shoes.

*skipping the Starbucks run*

I got home from Starbucks to find Avi dressed and sitting on my couch watching TV

"Hey lion" I say

"Hey Mitchy, is that what i think it is?" He says looking at the two drinks in my hand

I hand him one of the drinks and sit on a chair beside the couch. I need to ask him why he was in my bed with me. He usually lies with me and comforts me until I'm asleep and then he'll leave, but not today, he stayed and slept with me. Why?

"Hey Avi?"

"Yes Mitchy?" He questions

" Uh about last nigh-" He stopped me before I could finish

"Forget it Mitch, we don't need to talk about it now" He said deeply walking towards the door.

"I don't understand, What did I do wrong?" I beg for an answer "Avi dont you dare leave without giving me an explanation" I say angrily grabbing his arm

"Mitchy please" He begged "I cant do this right now i just have too go" He ripped his arm away from my hand and slammed the door as he walked out.

I broke down as the door closed. It's all my fault. Why did I have to try stop him. I don't deserve the life I have. I'm pathetic. Why did I think Avi ever actually loved me. Im weak. That's why Avi left, I'm hopeless, Impossible to be loved.

I walk to my bedroom and sit on the corner of my bed trying to calm down but I couldn't, the tears just keep roling down my cheeks. I pick up my phone and think about ringing Avi, and I do. the phone rang and rang. No answer. I threw my phone onto the bed beside me and walked to my bathroom. I looked up at myself in the mirror, I looked like a wreck. My lipstick was smudged and my mascara was running, I opened the little medicine cupboard looking for some tissues when I find my blade that I've kept hidden. I stopped and stared for a while.

This will solve everything. Avi can go back to having a normal life, not needing to deal with my problems and the rest of Ptx can find a replacement that's much better than me. I took the blade from my cupboard and sat on the edge of the bath tub. I take a deep breath and do the first cut. My breath hitched, but it didn't hurt. I cut my wrist again and again, deeper and deeper trying to feel something but theres nothing. I feel.. empty I take off my clothes leaving me only in my underwear, I run the blade across my thighs finally feeling some stinging. Noticing the blood on the floor I stood up looking at my hands and legs. Realising that Kevin should be here within half an hour too pick me up to go to the studio I carefully step into the shower, slowly putting my open wounds under the warm water.

*15 Minutes Later*

I didn't realise how long id been in the shower until i heard a knock on the door and someone say "You okay man?"

Assuming it was kevin i yelled "Just a minute, I'm in the shower"

I stepped out slowly, still in pain from the cuts. I reach over to grab my towel when someone walks in the door. It was Avi.

A/N This is my first ever fan fiction so please leave some feedback to help me improve my writing. Sorry if it was bad but i kept confusing myself with what i was trying to write
- Erin x