Trident: When you work at lush and a customer comes in and bites the soap because they think it's cheese... this happens way more frequently than you think.
Boomerang: If you stopped literally presenting soap as deli food this wouldn't happen.
Trident: Who goes into a bath store and thinks something covered in glitter is cheese?
SelfieStick: Who goes to the store and just takes a bite from the cheese?
--
Scribble: Bad news—Dog Food locked themself outside of their own house.
Scribble: Good news—we didn't have to wait around for a locksmith.
Scribble: Bad news—Boomerang finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory(TM). I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned it was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute guys/girls/enbies.
Scribble: Good news—a cute guy/girl/enby saw me do it.
Scribble: Bad news—it was Booky, and since they've already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, they'll never think I'm cool no matter what I do. It's too late. They know.
--
Trident: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?
Shelv: Several traffic violations.
Boomerang: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Booky: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.
Dynamite: Also, that's not our car.
--
Boomerang: I've invited you here because I crave the deadliest game...
Booky, nodding: Knife Monopoly.
Boomerang: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is.
--
