Less Than Lovers | LisRene AU

9

"You're going to have to let me buy you a cup of coffee eventually."

Lisa sat down, her presence pulling Irene away from her book. Irene smiled sheepishly and put her book away.

"I don't even like coffee," Irene said, as Lisa took a sip from the cup that was waiting for her when she arrived. "I get hot cocoa, but I was afraid you'd think I was a total dork so I always made sure to order before you got here."

"That's ridiculous," Lisa said.

"I know." Irene half-smiled.

Lisa was uncomfortable. So she made small talk. And what do you talk about with the girl who you're in love with who also broke your heart? Her father. Obviously.

"Your dad's nice." She cringed. She down looked at her hands around the coffee cup and played with the paper sleeve.

Irene hummed. "Yeah..."

"He's proud of you. It's...nice." Nice. Great word choice, really natural.

"Sometimes I feel like he sees me as half his daughter, half a doctor but...yeah. He's proud of me." Irene shrugged.

Silence. The barista at the front called out a name for a drink. The group of moms with their babies in their strollers pushed past to find a place to all sit. A student settled onto the table next to theirs, tossing his textbook and binder onto the table.

None of these people had any idea how difficult getting this conversation started was.

Lisa didn't really know what to expect when they finally talked to each other one-on-one, but she didn't expect this. She didn't expect to feel out of sorts. But she also didn't expect Irene's reaction.

Irene's eyes were bright. Hopeful. Completely unaware.

It made Lisa feel...sad? A little pity? Lisa came for finality, she realized she had no idea what Irene expected today.

She had thought of what she wanted to talk to her about. Her first instinct was to hurt Irene the same way she hurt her, but...Irene would have to care about her half as much as Lisa cared for her. And Lisa didn't have it in her.

She just...she just wanted the truth. She needed closure. An apology, maybe. Any kind of acknowledgment that she hurt her.

Part of her wanted Irene to just admit that she never felt anything for Lisa, that it was all a game. The ultimate closure, it would devastate her already pathetic, broken heart, but it would've been done.

She ran her hand through her hair, getting it out of her face. "Well...do you want to go first or should I?..."

Irene nodded. "Look, Lisa..." Here we go. "I should've been more honest with you. I was going to surprise you on that day, before Dr. Cochrane...before all that happened. I applied for a full-time position at the hospital, and despite Dr. Cochrane's threat, she didn't withdraw her support, so I got it. I began a week before your last appointment at the clinic. I just needed to inform you that I have terminated our physician-patient relationship."

Oh. Lisa let out a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"I wanted to do this all above board. It was going to be documented in your file, that you were no longer my patient, and we would finally be free..."

"Oh," she said, bitterly.

"Yeah..." Irene's face reflected hers, Lisa was sure. She looked sad. She also looked expectant, like she was waiting for Lisa's turn. And despite what Irene said, nothing had been fixed. She hadn't even apologized.