Walls | ShubIsh

Falling Again

Shubman couldn't reply to any of Ishan's monologue. He just couldn't. Ishan really cheated. Oh God, No. All this time he was just hoping that it would be a misunderstanding, a framed presentation.

Framed that one word struck Shubman. What if it really was? There you again, that's Shubman Gill for you. A person who is imbued with optimism.

Shubman didn't know why that conversation with Ishan didn't hurt him as much as he expected it to. Maybe because he had three months of hell to prepare him for me.

Maybe? His mind instantly flashes to that conversation. His mind recalled something that he shouldn't spot.

That emotion in Ishan's eyes. Shubman was crying back then. But now he could swear that Ishan was also on the verge of crying. That flicker of tears in Ishan's eyes. That uncertainty. Shubman has spotted that three years ago.

Three years ago(Shubman's POV)

I can tell that he is lying. I can feel that he is lying.

"Why are you lying, Ishu?" I said with a smile on my face.

"I am not lying. I don't have any feelings for you more than a friend." Ishan nearly screamed.

"Are you trying to convince me or yourself, Ishan?

" There is nothing to convince. "His voice got even louder this time.

I didn't say anything. Just stared at his eyes. I knew he was controlling his tears. It was a matter of moment that he broke down.

"Come here." Those were the two words that I'd spoken to him before he just rushed to arms.

I can still feel it you know. Ishan crying hysterically and my T-shirt was completely soaked.

"Shh.. Shh... It is going to be okay. We are gonna be okay. There is nothing wrong with you, Ishan."

"I'm so scared, Shubi. So scared of the world."

"It's okay to be scared, Ishu. But running from it like a coward is not okay."

Neutral POV

Shubman tried to push all the thoughts out of his head. But that look on Ishan's face. He knew there was something bigger in the picture. Even if it doesn't include him something has happened to his Ishan that has completely changed him.

What he didn't know was Ishan was crying hysterically again in his room Alone.  No one to hold him there. No one to just open their arms and say just fuck the world, I love you, Come here. No one to let him soak their shirt.

So Ishan was finding another way to cope with his pain which anyone should not find out.

At the end of the day, both of them was in their bed. Alone. Longing for the feeling of last night. They stared at the ceiling with broken hearts but didn't know if they should be grateful that life had given them the best four years of it or hurt that it had taken away the untouchable forever from themselves.