The Importance Of Workplace Safety

Ted Jenkins- OSHA Workplace Safety Inspector

It was a cold and rainy day in Gotham city, and its citizens bustled about on the sidewalks, umbrellas unfurled and spirits low. Being outside in Gotham wasn't often a pleasant experience- even on the rare occasions when the sun was out. The risk of muggings, terror attacks, car chases, and other various crimes left many Gothamites living in a constant state of fear for their own safety.

Fortunately, Ted Jenkins was a man who took safety very seriously. 

Ted was an OSHA workplace safety inspector, a position he wore like a badge of honour on his chest. He had been the one to shut down the Ace chemical factory for its unsafe storage of hazardous materials, something he had long since regarded as his greatest achievement. Although, today's job just might be the thing to take that title.

Ted adjusted his high vis vest and carefully stepped around a puddle. This morning he had made sure to select appropriate footwear for the weather, but he still knew better than to take unnecessary risks- that was the number one principle of safety. 

He cautiously made his way down the sidewalk, heading towards a nondescript alleyway a few blocks away from Gotham Academy. Normally, Ted wouldn’t trust someone who asked him to meet up under such circumstances -this was Gotham, after all. But the person who asked him here wasn't just anyone, and Ted knew without a doubt that he couldn't turn down this inspection… 

Stepping around the corner and into the alley, he stood in the corner to wait. The rain pelted against his head, sliding down his vest to pool on the ground around his shoes. 

'He should be here soon', Ted thought, looking down at his watch. He had arrived a few minutes early (as he did for everything), but he suspected he wouldn't be kept waiting long. 

Sure enough, Ted heard a gravelly voice begin to speak behind him, and he turned to face a caped figure, shrouded in shadow.

“Ted Jenkins, OSHA safety inspector. You live alone, on 3416 Murphy Avenue- the apartment with the leaky roof. You're 43 years old, born on August third in the year 1980 to Helen and Bob Jenkins.” The voice said. 

“Yes sir… that would be me!” Ted responded. “But why are you telling me all this?”

“I know everything about you, but you know nothing about me,” the shadow said. “Even though you're about to see something no one else has had the privilege to, I still intend to keep things that way. Understood?”

“Of course, sir… I understand the confidentiality of this situation completely- it's why I was the one chosen to audit your teams, uh... workplace,” Ted finished awkwardly, unsure how exactly to put it.

"Then we're in agreement.”

“Yes, it would seem that we are… Batman.”

A bolt of lightning split through the sky in the distance, illuminating the imposing Dark Knight of Gotham as he loomed over Ted. The white eyes of his cowl gleamed with an indescribable ferocity that had paralyzed many a Gotham criminal in fear. But Ted Jenkins wasn't afraid. In the past thirty seven years, he hadn't felt unsafe once, not since he decided to pursue the career of an OSHA inspector at the ripe age of six. 

“In the interest of discretion, I can't have you awake while I take you there,” Batman said, moving towards Ted and reaching for something in his utility belt. 

“I understand,” Ted said with a solemn nod. “You do what you need to do, and I'll do what I need to do.” He adjusted the clipboard in his hands that contained his safety checklist and watches as Batman pulled out a small black canister. He had an idea of what he was looking at- though not the specifics. Perhaps a normal man would have hesitated, or asked more questions. But Ted wasn't a normal man. He was an OSHA inspector, and he would do anything in the name of safety.

Ted took a step forwards, and as Batman opened the canister under his nose, he felt the drowsiness overtake him with a surprising speed. His legs and arms almost immediately went numb, and he slumped against the alley wall, closing his eyes and embracing the sensation. The sooner this part of the job was done, the sooner he'd get there- to the place he was sent to inspect.

Yes. The sooner Ted fell asleep, the sooner he would be taken to… the Watchtower.