A piece of my heart : Finding closure

She forgave !

My dog was a huge part of my life . I was 12 years old when she came into my life. I fell in love with her instantly. I knew she was made for me . Later I discovered that maybe she's made of me . Let me elaborate on that . I always thought of a dog to be bold and protective.I was in for a shock . She was more timid than me .She was afraid of the dark and I can swear she saw ghosts and was afraid of them . She was afraid of her shadow at night . Before getting her I had a "ghost encounter" . I would take her with me to the toilet because I was scared I would see something and guess what, when I opened the door to run to safety ( which was my room ,also you know ghosts don't come when the TV is on right ? ) ,she would run faster than me .

There are a million things I could write about her because she was nothing I expected a dog to be like and she was my first ever pet. She is still one of the most precious souls I know . However, today I am not here to talk about her legacy . I'm here to talk about how I finally released the trauma of losing her after 6 years of her passing.

In 2022 ,I  watched a documentary on Netflix that covered some topics about after life . It's called ' Surviving Death'   . It covers a wide range of topics like near death experiences and reincarnation. It also covered the topic of psychic mediums that helped people connect with loved ones that have crossed over. I am a sceptic ( and I continue to remain one ) however, I still like to keep an open mind . So ,that episode inspired me to "contact" my dog . I asked her forgiveness because in all honesty I was to blame for her untimely demise. I almost prayed to her and I went to sleep . For all these years I would have nightmares that she's sick and I'm holding her in my arms and rushing to the hospital but each time I'm too late to save her . That was just dreams right? But I would sob uncontrollably when I was awake . The situation was so bad that I didn't see her pictures ,say her name or even mention her to anyone. After around too weeks I got a dream and it was divine. Her glowing ,youthful and happy spirit came , wagging her tail and touching my face with her nose . I don't know how or why but after I woke up ,I felt like she was in a better place and she wasn't angry with me at all. It gave me a divine peace and assurance and to be honest,I know her and I know she's a kind forgiving soul .She wasn't special just  to me ,I was also special to her . We were two  souls brought together to form a beautiful bond for a brief time .

After two years of her passing,I became a cat mommy to 35 cats .When I'm old and in my deathbed ,I will be looking forward to her and all my cats coming to pick me up ( along with other loved ones ) . Until then ,I choose to believe they all live(for those that have passed ) in a hilly area , happily playing together and waiting for me and my folks .