killing time 𖥻 TOMMYINNIT

XXXIII. a million things

it was tommy's last day in nottingham, and he was sitting with his head in iris's lap. they were at the park, on their bench. they'd done it hundreds of times, during high school they spent practically every afternoon on that bench. but now, this would probably be the last time they did it, at least for a while.

iris had made plans to move up to brighton with ranboo in two months when she had early graduation from college, and they'd already gone flat hunting. she'd announced her debut album's release date the day earlier and her second single had come out at the same time. this time, she'd turned her phone off and spent the day with tommy.

summer was going out with a vegeance, and they had barely moved in the past couple of hours. tommy had brought his phone and they were sharing earbuds, but eventually it had gotten too many senses for iris so they'd turned it off.

"promise me you'll call me when you get there?" she asked quietly.

tommy exhaled, looking up at her softly. "no, i'll actually be using this as an opportunity to ghost you," he said, mock seriousness spread on his face. "it's not like you're my girlfriend or anything." iris liked hearing tommy call her his girlfriend, and she couldn't hide the pink tinge that her cheeks took on.

"i was just checking," she bit the inside of her cheek.

"don't do that," tommy sat up, pulling on her hands. "i will call you every single day, so much that you'll start to get sick of me."

he managed to pull her into a standing position. "i got sick of you about ten years ago," she placed a kiss on the corner of his mouth, a sickly sweet smile on her face. "but if you wanted to do some horrible shit to give me inspiration for music, then i would allow that."

"no," tommy didn't even entertain the thought. "sorry, guess you'll have to just write songs about how much you love me."

"boring," her limbs ached from the heat and she dragged tommy over to a grassier area. "i'm going to miss you tomorrow, pathetic i know."

he laughed, and she thought for a second that it was at her. but even if it was, tommy's hand was securely wrapped around her own. regardless of how stupid she looked in front of him, he knew her inside and out. he liked her anyway. "if that's pathetic, then what's the word for i miss you already?"

they'd both been so busy lately, iris taking more classes than normal for her early graduation, plus with the album coming out. tommy had a lot of streaming and youtube plans for after his move, and it hadn't left them a lot of time just for each other.

they were still figuring out how to navigate a relationship. it felt staggeringly similar to how they were before, but there was a new layer of intimacy. iris would always be tommy's best friend, there was nothing that could ever change that, but this felt different. iris was never like tommy's other friends, and that was only becoming more and more obvious with each watermelon chapstick mark placed on tommy's lips.

he admired her ability to put it into words. he never could. no, if you asked him how he felt about iris the answer would be quite simple; a million things. and yet, he couldn't name a single one. iris? she could write you three verses, a chorus and a bridge.

she always knew what he was thinking somehow, and yet she'd never even entertained the possibility that he liked her even a fraction of the amount she liked him. he'd never understood that either. it was basically as though tommy wore a sign saying 'i'm in love with my best friend' but somehow she hadn't seen it.

"thank you for spending today with me," she said bashfully. she was fiddling with her plethora of rings and intentionally avoiding his gaze. "i know you've got your thing, and i've got my thing. and obviously, everyone knows about us, but..."

"us," tommy emphasized.

she squeezed his hand. "you don't mind, do you?"

tommy laughed again, and this time it felt more comforting than nerve-wracking. "no, i don't mind keeping my lovely girlfriend to myself for as long as she wants. i like us."

it was different, now that everyone knew what iris looked like. it had been incredibly jarring at first, the first time somebody had recognised her in the street. she'd been out with ranboo, and she'd had the beginnings of an anxiety attack after she'd plastered a smile on for the girl who wanted a photo. they'd lost the air of slight anonymity that they'd had with iris staying faceless.

but that meant that the park, their park, their bench, which remained pretty much deserted, was even more special. "we should probably get back soon, mum'll be wanting to hang out before i leave in the morning."

iris nodded. "yeah, yeah, of course. i have an essay, so i should probably be heading back soon anyway." tommy helped her up, keeping her hand encased in his. "do you... you wouldn't mind if i came and said goodbye tomorrow morning?"

"i'm not leaving forever," he reminded her gently. "i'll be an hour away, and then you'll finish up college and your flat is fifteen minutes from mine. i'll come see you whenever you want, or you can come see me. you are my favourite person in the whole world, this isn't changing that. nothing could. it's you and me."

iris smiled at her converse. "right, i'm sorry," he gave her a look and she relented. "you and me."

and as they walked back to their street hand in hand, the same route they'd travelled a hundred times, the last time they'd be this close and this secluded for a while, it felt like that was true.

— AUTHOR'S NOTE
i really just am unsure of what to say here to fully encapsulate how i feel about finishing this book. i've been working on this for a long time, plus i feel like i hardly ever actually finish fics all the way through you know?? i'm gonna miss them, and i don't care if the ending is cheesy, they deserve a little bit of cheese after what i put them through. but iris and tommy are genuinely two of my favourite people to write, but i feel like this is a good place to end it. this has been one of my favourite fics to write, the one i just kept coming back to, and i do want to say thank you so much to everyone who read this, i really appreciate it. i hope you enjoyed!!! thank you for reading <3333