Something ventured, Someone Framed (S1EP9)

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[Open on a classroom with a sign "HUMAN APPRECIATION SOCIETY", in which there is various items from the human realm, being incorrectly labelled, are on a desk. Among them are a cheese grater labelled "Nail Clippers", a bag of chips closed with a flip phone labelled "Whoopie Cushion", an upside down umbrella hat filled with leaves labelled "Food Bowl", a Rubik's cube labelled "Weapon?" and a paper clip labelled "Pay-Per-Clorp"]

Gus: Behold! The wonders of the Human Realm! [Picks up the paper clip] This little fella's is one of their most valued objects. It aids in the compiling of printed wisdom, the scratching of gunk from under your nails, and my favorite. [Brings the paper clip close to his ear] It even mimics the sounds of the human ocean!

[Gus proceed to twang(?) it]

Gus: Ah! The Human Realm! So beautiful. [Walks over to the chalkboard] It's sad it say that the Pay-Per-Clorp is a stunning testament to human ingenuity. Any questions?

[Gus turns around to face the rest of the rest of the club and the Bard track students are all falling asleep, and look thoroughly bored. Mattholomule raises his hand]

Gus: Ah! Our newest member; Mattholomule!

Mattholomule: A-Augustus? Is this what the president of the Human Appreciation Society thinks passes as "Human Artifacts"?

[Gus looks at Mattholomule in confusion]

Mattholomule: Because, at my old school, [Pushes aside Gus's items] We had real treasures.

[Mattholomule empties out his bag onto the desk, dumping out a rock painted to look like a cell phone, an egg with a skull painted on it, and a shoe made out of mud, leaves and twigs. They're labelled "Cellular Phone", "Human Skull", and "Sports Footwear" respectively. The other members of the club gasp and lean closer to them]

Boy #1: So real!

Boy #2:Wow!

Boy #1: I-I wanna touch them.

Mattholomule: Go ahead. In my old club, we didn't have any dumb rules.

Gus: [Gasps and turns to his list of rules] Shh...he didn't mean that.

[Gus glares at everyone touching Mattholomule's objects, then takes them away]

Boy: Hey!

Boy: What?

Eileen: [Grunts]

Gus: Well, this isn't your club. Thankfully.

Mattholomule: Exactly, who here thinks I should be president?

Eileen: I do!

Boy: Mattholomule for prez.

Boy: I'm an undecided voter! I wanna touch all the objects first.

[The club talked over each other as Gus picks up the "phone"]

Gus: These are fakes!

Boy: [Gasps] What?

Mattholomule: [Stammers] U-uh, you can't prove that! [Inhales] You're just trying to distract these human appreciators! You're just afraid of getting kicked out of office. It's your words against mine.

Eileen: [Mumbles]

Boy: I don't know what to believe in anymore.

Boy: My faith in Gus has been broken.

[Gus walks backwards into the chalkboard. Gus looks at newspaper clip with a picture of on it]

Gus: What if....I brought in an expert?

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