Addiction [Rick Grimes]

Chapter 4

It was 45 minutes of awkward silence once Shane left the house, leaving Gabriella to silently cry as she prepared some food for herself and Rick.

Rick watched her curiously as she moved around the kitchen, he knew she was crying, but he also knew she didn't want him to see that.

His fingers twiddled with a loose thread on the arm of the couch. His mind was working overtime, he wanted to open his mouth to speak, but he couldn't find the right words. He stood slowly, approaching the kitchen island where Gabriella was chopping carrots, quite aggressively before she wiped away more tears.

He watched her for a few minutes, trying to work out what he should say. He wasn't sure why he asked, she was upset with her how problems, never mind his, but the words left and he regretted it instantly, "did you know?"

Gabriella looked up slowly, "no, I didn't know," she replied firmly. "I swear, if I had known I would have told you. I don't tolerate liars and cheats."

Rick sighed, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything. You clearly have your own marital complications without having to listen or deal with mine."

Gabriella placed the knife she was using down and turned her back to Rick, sliding the diced carrots into the boiling pot. "He wants a baby. Shane wants a baby," she announced.

Rick was surprised, "Shane? Shane Walsh, wants a baby?" He question, almost wondering if he had heard her correctly.

She turned back to look at him, almost smiling, "yes, who would've thought it. It still surprises everyone that he settled down, got married and bought a house, never mind wanting a baby. It's strange," she paused, wondering if she should pour her problems out to Rick, but he looked at her expectantly, so she continued, "before we got married, he sat me down, we had a long discussion, he insisted that children would never be on the cards for him. I accepted that, I wasn't, I'm still not sure I want to be a Mother, but eight months ago," she sighed, "he came home from work and dropped the bomb that he wanted to try for a baby."

"Wow," was the only word Rick could say in that moment. He sat down on a stool near the island and sipped from his bottle of beer.

Gabriella poured herself more wine and spoke again, "I'm scared that if I agree and I get pregnant that he won't want it once it's born, or what if I don't, you know? He was so adamant about no children.." she trailed off.

Rick nodded slowly before he spoke, "me and Lori spoke about trying for a baby at the beginning of the year, it didn't work out for the first couple of months and then she quit her job so I started working more hours to cover the mortgage payments and then-then I find out she's been having an affair," he laughed bitterly, "I wonder if she would have still gone ahead with an affair if she had been pregnant."

"I would hate to think," Gabriella replied before taking a sip of her wine. "Do you think you and Lori could ever work this out? Not condoning or saying you should forgive her," she added quickly when his face turned dark, "it's just, with Carl, and you've always been such a great couple from what I've seen."

He shrugged his shoulders and took another sip of his beer, "I'll never be able to trust her again. I tried to put all of my love, time and effort into our relationship. I always have. I've been so exhausted these last months, just so she would be happy..."

"But what about Carl?" She cut him off.

He shrugged again, "she's been palming him off to other people while she sleeps around with some guy who she is too scared to name. He's my son and I'll protect him no matter what, even if that means protecting him from his own selfish mother. I just hope it doesn't go that far."