Hidden Love

Rumor Has It

All week, Kevin was distracted. He tried to grade papers, but he kept thinking about how much of a mistake it would be to go to this dinner. Eden was right; this group was full of bad influences. One bad influence stood out to him and pictures of Connor from their mission flooded Kevin's mind. He gave up on grading. Instead, Kevin continued his Facebook stalking. He was at work this time and didn't need to worry about his wife. It was his planning period, so he had no students. He planned his lessons, so he could scroll through Connor's page. Connor hadn't passed Kevin's mind in years, but seeing his name in the dinner invitation made it impossible for Kevin to stop thinking about him and their time in Uganda together. You see, Kevin was weak back then. A lot had happened to him, and his mind was vulnerable to the events surrounding him. He and the rest of the Elders had finished their two years in the village, helping in their own way without the church. They had let go of the many rules they followed: they drank coffee and alcohol, they went to sleep when they wanted and woke up later than usual, and they accepted different sexualities. Kevin partook in all of this, and he enjoyed it. He loved coffee and having fun once in a while with alcohol (they only drank a few times, but it was fun). He loved having a flexible sleep schedule, especially since his nightmares made sleeping difficult. And he loved being with Connor. They hadn't gone too far. That was something older Kevin was thankful for. The most the two boys did was kiss in bed, but they kept their hands above their hips.

Kevin closed his eyes and let out a breath as he remembered the feeling of Connor's lips. It had taken a long while for Kevin to be okay with others touching him after his run-in with the General. It started with hugs from Arnold, which quickly turned into a form of comfort after nightmares. Then, Kevin slowly became more okay with Connor. First, it was their shoulders bumping on accident. Then, it was Connor's leg next to his while they watched movies when both of them couldn't sleep. Next, it was Connor's hand on his back. Finally, they kissed and Kevin was okay with it. It took nearly a year for this to happen, but once it did, it became Kevin's favorite form of comfort.

Kevin's eyes flew open when he heard someone clear their throat. Standing in front of him was one of the other teachers, Elijah Grant. Elijah went to the same MTC as Kevin and respected Kevin for coming back to the church after rumors of a bad mission. The church kept the details on the down-low. Elijah was handsome. He had blonde hair that was cut short on the sides and styled neatly on top and grey-blue eyes that weren't as bright as Connor's. Elijah had grown into his looks since the MTC, Kevin thought. Back then, Elijah still had a bit of a baby face. Now, his jawline was more prominent and littered with light stubble. Even if he wasn't gay, Kevin could admit that Elijah was a good-looking guy.

"Oh, hey, Mr. Grant." Kevin cleared his throat.

"Sleeping on the job, Price?" Elijah joked, sitting on a desk near Kevin's.

"No," Kevin said, "I was just daydreaming."

"About?" Elijah wagged his eyebrows.

Kevin shook his head, "Nothing interesting. What do you need?"

"What, a guy can't come talk to his buddy?"

Kevin raised an eyebrow.

"Alright, fine. I heard your mission group is getting back together," Elijah said, leaning in. "Are you going?"

Kevin frowned, "Where'd you hear that from?"

"The grapevine. So?"

"Yes," Kevin sighed, "I'm going. I may not agree with everything they've decided to do with their lives, but they are good guys."

"Hm, I heard, like, three of them turned gay. Is that true?" Kevin didn't mind Elijah most of the time, but one thing he didn't love was how much of a gossip the other man was.

Kevin sighed, "Two of them are gay. One of them is bi. I don't see why that matters."

"Bi? Why doesn't he just own up to being gay if he's gonna be with a man?" Elijah asked. "Besides, 3 out of 8 turned out to be queers? That's not great."

"And 5 of us stayed normal," Kevin shrugged, "Plus, bisexual isn't the same as being gay."

"Whatever. Isn't your buddy marrying one of the villagers?"

Kevin nodded, "Yeah, he is." He smiled, "I'm really happy for him. Nabulungi is an amazing woman."

"I'm just shocked he could pull."

Kevin frowned slightly, "Why? I know he's not conventually attractive, but Arnold has an amazing personality. He's incredibly creative and always super nice. He's one of the best people I've met."

"You sound like you're in love with him," Elijah joked, laughing at himself.

Kevin felt his face warm, "Did you only come here to gossip? I have work to do."

"That's why you were sleeping, right?" Elijah smirked. "Whatever, I'll let you get back to 'work'. Let me know how that dinner goes, yeah?"

Kevin sighed, "I don't think it'll be very interesting, but sure."

"Great," Elijah stood up, "I'll see you later!" He walked out, leaving Kevin alone to think about the dinner more. His mind wandered back to Connor, causing him to become curious as to what the redhead was like now. He had been a great leader, stern yet kind. He'd have been a great teacher or coach of some sort. He knew Connor also liked musical theatre, so Kevin wondered if he had gotten a job somewhere as an actor or director. The rest of the day went by quickly, with Kevin getting no grading and lots of thinking done.

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He felt guilty. He hadn't thought about men like that in so long and just seeing Connor McKinley's name on his screen made him reverse all the hard work he'd put into being 'normal'. Kevin was standing by his closet, wondering if he should wear blue or white to the reunion dinner, when he realized that it didn't matter. He had no reason to impress anyone there. He grabbed the white shirt and threw it on, checking himself in the mirror. After fiddling with the buttons, he decided the blue shirt looked better on him. He buttoned the blue shirt up and tucked it into his pants, simple black trousers. In truth, he felt that the white shirt with black pants made him look too much like a missionary, like the old Kevin Price these guys knew years ago. He went to the bathroom, grabbed his hair gel, and ran his hands through it to style it. That was one thing that hadn't changed much over the years; he was still anal about his hairstyle. He spent roughly 20 minutes in the bathroom making sure his hair was perfect.

When he walked out, he called out to his wife, "Dear, do you think I should wear a tie?"

Eden walked in, "I don't know. How formal will it be?"

"I'm not sure," Kevin said, holding a couple ties to his chest, "I could always take it off."

She nodded, "Wear the dark blue tie, then. it goes well with the shirt."

Kevin nodded, setting the other tie down, "You're good with watching Em tonight? I don't know how late I'll be out." He looked in the mirror, tying the knot of the tie.

"Yes, Kevin, I can take care of my own child," Eden said, bitterness in her words. "Just, don't stay out too late."

"I'll try not to," Kevin said, making sure not to promise. He knew there was a possibility they lost track of time. He walked over and kissed her on the cheek, "I'll text when I'm on my way." He walked out of the room, being sure to walk quietly as Emily was in her room taking a nap. He was thankful for that, as she had a tendency to cry when she saw him leave. Getting into his car, Kevin took a deep breath and started on his way to the restaurant Arnold had sent him to.