J.H. 86 | The Inevitable Nothingness

Nineteen | Parker

Jack

I bounce into the hospital after my afternoon game with a pep in my step, excited to see Parker after a long week away on the road. I'd been texting her every day all the way up until my game today, each text full of love and want and need, and I wasn't afraid to admit that I was entirely whipped over her. She was perfect, from the smile she tries to bite back every time in within her presence to the way she gives me shit for having girls after me, and being completely and totally in love with her instead.

I couldn't wait to see her, and being away from her for so long while I knew she wasn't getting any better had been my hardest road trip to date. I hold a stuffed animal under my arms, and box of brownies on my hand, and a smile I couldn't hold back if I tried.

Mary snaps her head up at the reception desk as I whisk past happily, not a care in the world. I ignore her as she jumps to her feet.

"Jack!" She shouts, her tone warning, but I only offer her a small wave as response as I continue down the halls to Parker's room. I don't see the way she outwardly sighs, chewing on the inside of her cheek with a furrowed brow expression.

I round the corner with a smile, but that smile drops in an instant at the sight of her room completely empty, except for her bed and various medical equipment. But her baby yellow sheets are gone, her fairy lights too, and there isn't even a trace of her left, like she was never there to begin with.

At first, I frown deeply, checking the room number as if I'd accidentally wound up in the wrong place, but when I see Parker's name still written in bright pink marker on the white board by her door, my stomach swirls with anxiety.

I take three cautious steps into the empty room, glancing around in deep confusion as an ugly feeling settles in the out of my stomach, and my heart tugs painfully with realisation, but I push the thought down along with fear. She could not be gone.

Not now, not when I'd spoken to her hours ago.

I turn back to the door to find Mary behind me, waiting with me with a pained expression. Accusingly, I scowl at her. "Where is she?"

No words come out of Mary's mouth as she purses her lips, shaking her head violently. My bottom lip wobbles as a spluttering cough comes out. "No," I whisper.

Mary looks like she's fighting tears of her own as she breathes right back: "I'm so so sorry, baby."

"No," I cry, pulling at the ends of my hair with both hands, glancing around the room in shock and disbelief and denial. "Dont lie to me, Mary, where is she? Where's Parker?"

I'm flat out shouting at her, even though she doesn't deserve it, but I can't find it in me to be sorry. Mary recoils visibly, still shaking her head, like she's in denial herself. "Jack, I'm sorry. It happened so fast, we couldn't stop it."

"You're lying!" I shout, crying as hard as I ever have. "You're lying, where is she, Mary? Where's Parker?"

"Hey, woah, Jack!" It's Olive. She runs into the room, wrapping her arms around my middle, hugging me as tight as she physically can, which is not very tight, but it's enough to make me break down in her arms. So, curling up, I cry into her hair. "I'm so sorry, Jack."

"How could she go?" I cry, hard, openly and without regret. "How could she do that? I loved her, Olive! I love her so much. She can't go."