New Beginnings (Vampire Diaries)

Chapter 1: Bennett Diaries

Elena,

You told me to write my life down on paper for you, so here's some more of it.

Yesterday was your birthday. Damon and I visited you, which was not any easier than it usually is. I keep thinking back to when you were here, when I could give you a hug on your birthday, and not have to . I feel so alone. Caroline just got married to Stefan, so she doesn't have time for me anymore, and I feel like every time Damon looks at me, he just wishes I was dead so he could have you back. I know what happened is not my fault, but I can't help but feel guilty for even being alive sometimes. It's like every second that I'm breathing is another second that someone else has to suffer and another second of your life that you miss out on. I miss you soo much that I get teary eyed if someone even mentions something we used to do together.

I just wish you were here. I need my best friend back. Some days something totally exciting will happen, and I will call your phone to tell you the news. I remember that you're gone, and then I realize that I'm never going to be able to tell you these kinds of things ever again, and i break down crying.

Okay, so. On a lighter note, I got back together with someone whom you know very well. He has the same dark brown hair as you, and the same chocolatey brown eyes, and he happens to look alot like you. If you didn't already get the memo... yeah. Jeremy and I got back together! You would not believe how handsome he's gotten Elena... you wouldn't even recognize him. I hope you still approve of me dating your brother, because he makes me really happy. Being around him makes me feel closer to you, in a way.

                                                                                                                         

-Bonnie

Bonnie closed her journal and sighed deeply. She had no idea how a whole ten years had already passed since Elena was gone. It felt like yesterday. She could still feel the searing pain she felt when she heard the news of what Kai had done. She had been so sure that her life would be cut short by Damon, but once again, he surprised everyone with his uncharacteristic selflessness.

"Oh Bon-Bon..." said jeremy, waltzing into her room. She put the journal back in her dresser drawer and sat up on her bed. She laughed at her boyfriend's adorably awkward dancing and automatically felt happier.

"Oh Jer-Jer..." she joked, kissing him quickly on the cheek, "Where are you going?" she noticed he was dressed already, even though it was only 7:30 in the morning.

"I think you meant to say where are we going." he said grabbing her by the arm and ripping her from her cozy bed.

"Where in the world are we going at this early of a time?" she asked.

"We are going to the park." he said, his mind clearly made up already. To Bonnie, it seemed like a very mundane activity for such abnormal people to do together. "It's a beautiful day, and we are going to enjoy it. Together." he said.

Bonnie knew that inside, Jeremy was falling apart without his big sister, but he stayed strong for her. She knew how hard that must be for him. Bonnie on the other hand, anyone with eyes could tell that she was not okay. She walked through life with a smile painted on her face, even though it was false. The only time she was truly happy was with Jeremy.

"Odd choice of activity for Jeremy Gilbert, but I'll go with it." she said, throwing on a white sundress and brown sandals. When she was done getting ready, Jeremy gazed at her admiringly.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked him suspiciously.

"Because you are beautiful." he said grabbing her by the hand and leading her out of the room. They walked outside and Bonnie felt the warmth of the early sun on her skin. She smiled a real smile. Bonnie paused and turned to look back at their house one last time. She had moved in with Jeremy a few weeks ago. He had spend three years rebuilding the Gilbert house. It was insane how accurate he was at recreating it. Jeremy had said that when Elena came back, he wanted her to have somewhere she could go that reminded her of her family. Somewhere that reminded her of him---in case he never got to see her again. She looked back at Jeremy and leaned her head on his shoulder as they walked, feeling truly satisfied for once.

They made it to the park in under fifteen minutes. The golden sunlight was cast against the leaves of the trees, and they scattered the light like a disco ball all over the ground. The rainy Spring had done the plant-life wonders; it was a deep shade of green, which was Bonnie's favorite color. She had felt a deep connection to plants since she was a little girl, being a witch and all, but as she got older that connection intensified. Bonnie took Jeremy over to the flowers that lined the pathway. They had not yet blossomed.

"Watch." she said. Bonnie closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and her hands brushed each of the blooms. They opened under her touch, and beautiful cotton-candy pink hydrangeas appeared. Bonnie smiled at her success.

"Wow." was all Jeremy could say. He touched the soft petals and plucked a flower off of its stem, tucking it behind Bonnie's ear. He looked deep into her eyes, and she felt as though the world around her was melting away. All of a sudden, Bonnie felt a drip of water hit her face, and looked up at the sky. Since when were there even clouds in the sky? And then the rain came down in sheets, soaking them in seconds.

"So much for the beautiful weather..." Jeremy said, laughing, "oh well." He turned towards her, and he started chasing her down the path. Bonnie squealed and sprinted away, her feet landing in puddles that sent water flying upward with every step. She was too slow. He lifter Bonnie up off of the ground like a doll and spun her around in the air. "Nooooooo!" She screamed and laughed like a child. He finally let her down, and she was laughing so hard it took a while for her to catch her breath. She looked up at him and put her arms around his broad shoulders, having to stand on her toes in order to reach him. His hair was wet against his face, and his black v-neck tshirt clung to his body, revealing the muscles underneath. With the pouring rain still coming down on them, Jeremy leaned down and kissed Bonnie. He clutched the back of her dress as they kissed, and Bonnie ran her hand through his wet hair. She laughed against his mouth. He hoisted her up and she wrapped her legs around him, kissing him passionately. She felt the rain slow and pulled away for a moment, smiling from ear to ear.

"I love you Jeremy Gilbert. I love you so much." she said, out of breath. She watched his soft brown eyes brighten to her words, and leaned down to kiss her again.

"I love you too Bonnie Bennett." he said back.