The Land Which Bears Your Footprints

Chapter 8 - Just Know That I Tried

Author's Note: And the story comes to a close! I hope that you enjoyed this story, and find the ending satisfactory! Thank you all so much for being part of this journey! :D

~ Amina Gila

Rey knew the moment was coming, but that didn't prepare her for the moment she feels her bond with Sidious shatter. She stumbles a step with a gasp, leaning against the side of the fighter Poe was showing off to them.

It –

He – he's gone. He just...

Her grandfather is dead. And it's all because of her. She never realized how much she didn't truly believe things would come to this, until right now. He's gone. Gone, and he's never coming back, and this is all because –

Why, why did she ever do that? Why did she...? Well, she knows but that doesn't mean it had to end like this, and she doesn't care about anything at all right now other than that he's gone. And now she never can see him again.

Why –

"Rey?" Finn asks, sounding almost freaked out.

He looks blurry through her tears; she doesn't know when she started crying, but she can't make herself stop, either. She didn't know anything could hurt quite this much, even if the gaping emptiness that this ripped inside of her feels like something she's felt constantly before. It feels like it defined her existence for a long time before. Not that it makes it any easier to feel now.

She feels Finn touch her uncertainly, but nothing could help right now. Poe just seems to be confused and unsure how to handle this to say anything at all.

But then, she feels something shifting, changing in the Force. Ben is... he's in danger. Something's happening to him too. She doesn't know what, but it feels bad. She can feel his panic and desperation, even on the other side of the galaxy and then she feels him reaching for her, with the Force.

She still has no idea what's happening, but she could almost swear that she still senses her grandfather. Which doesn't make any sense if he's dead, but she can definitely feel him, and he's doing something to Ben. Hurting him.

And there's nothing she can do about that, either. Except wait as Ben draws on her strength in the Force too, to fight off whatever's happening. Finally, she feels him pull back, and Sidious' presence recedes too.

Ben's okay, but... he's not. He's gone.

She sinks to the ground next to the fighter, breathing in and out shakily. Who did it? She doesn't want that answer. She'd rather never know if it was Ben, or – or what.

But she hates herself even more for being glad that at least the others are okay, even if that does little to lessen how much this hurts.

"You alright?" Poe asks, awkwardly, finally.

"Give me a minute," she mutters, shakily. It'll be taking a lot more than a minute to calm down, though. She doesn't know that it's possible to feel alright again.

***

Sidious is gone. Ben is relieved about that, but he can't stop wondering if the Sith will find some way to come back, anyway. He did once already, and it's not like his spirit was gone. At the same time, he doesn't exactly think so. If Sidious does return, it isn't something they can control or stop now. They've done everything they could, and now, it's time to keep moving.

Most importantly, he needs to find Rey, to talk to her again and make sure she's okay. He knows she isn't, but he – he can't imagine what it would be like to lose the only family member she knows, even if that meant nothing to Sidious. Rey believed it did, and he can't blame her for that. Sidious is all she had.