I Dreamt of Heaven

Disappointment

"This will not be our last moment.."

"Biggest lie if I've ever heard one." Killua whispered to himself.

Both Leorio and Kurapika look at him in shock. They were all discussing something, and Killua seemed to doze off into his own world while the others talked.

"What? How is that the biggest lie you've ever heard? I was literally just explaining how this happened to all of us." Kurapika said as Killua jumped up in surprise to his response. Killua didn't realize he said that out loud.

"Crap.. Sorry, I was dozing off, and I remembered something Gon said. I didn't realize I said it out loud, though." Killua replied back quietly. He looked quite embarrassed from what he accidentally said. His face was slightly pink while his hair was covering his eyes so Kurapika and Leorio couldn't see them.

"It's alright, kid. Just try not to think about him often. It'll help a lot, I promise you. Gon wouldn't want to see you all mopy and depressed now. Would he?" Leorio said. He understood what Killua was feeling. It's been 3 years, and Killua has been getting worse.

"I guess so.. But I can't help it, Leorio. You and Kurapika know how much Gon meant to me. He must've thought nothing of me when he decided to die out there. He lied to me, and I'm still mad about it. He may be dead, but that doesn't mean he had to be so stupid and selfish to just go and get himself killed." Killua said, out of anger. He hated how Gon was so reckless about the situation. Killua hated that he was lied to.

Killua once said to himself, "If I ever die, the first thing I'll do is find Gon and punch him. Then, kiss him, of course."

He laughed out loud at his thoughts.

"What's so funny? Weren't you just mad like a second ago?" Kurapika asked.

Killua cursed under his breath.

"My bad again, I was thinking to myself, and one of my thoughts made me laugh. Whatever, what were you guys talking about?" Killua asked as he tried to change the subject so they could stop talking about him.

"We were about to get ready to go out and eat something. Go get dressed. I don't want you to be all depressed all day. I get it. You miss Gon. So do I, and so does Leorio. But you have to understand that everyone dies one day. Even if they die young or not, we just have to accept the fact that they aren't here anymore. I know you loved him, but you have to try to move on, Killua." Kurapika explained. He was trying his hardest to help Killua recover since that day. And he hasn't accomplished much on that.

Killua took a deep breath and sighed. He knew Kurapika was right. He is always right. And it irritates Killua to the core.

"He's right, you know. And you hate it. Trust me, I do, too. But it's just the truth, and we have to just keep moving forward without looking back. How are we, specifically you, ever going to move forward while you're still stuck in the past, looking back. You can't move forward if you're still looking back. You need to keep your eyes on the road that's ahead of you, not in the back of you." Leorio explained.

"Alright, alright! I get it. There is no need to get so inspirational. It pisses me off for some reason, and I don't know why." Killua said with his head down. "I'll just go get dressed." He said.

Killua walked off into his room, leaving Leorio and Kurapika alone.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Kurapika asked Leorio.

"I don't know, but hopefully, he gets through it. It makes me angry that I can't do anything to help him. Why must he be so stubborn. I know he misses Gon and that he loves him, but there has to be more to that that he's not willing to let go." responded, Leorio.