I can find comfort in silence, it can hug me like the touch I crave and the words I wish to hear.
Silence can also bring out the worst, the ugly, the bad. It leaves my head spinning with thoughts and a past full of choices that impact my mind.
Most of the time I enjoy silence.
Some of the time;
When silence becomes bad, my mind hurtles towards places I wish to forget, words I never want to speak again, people I hope I never see again.
That silence leaves me sinking to the bottom of the ocean where the air left in my lungs leaves with small bubbles, racing past each other like a game, up and onwards to merge with the air above the surface while my vision fades to black.
But sometimes I so crave that silence.
Not the bad silence, but the silence where I'm given room to be. Be me, be without judgement or obligations, be free.
It's hard to know when good silence becomes bad silence, I wonder if I'll ever figure that out.
