Rock n' Roll *Edited*

Chapter Thirteen: The talk

I went to her room and knocked on the closed door. She opened it and had a fake smile on her face. I knew she wanted to pretend she was okay. But I really, really don't want her to go down the road again with self harm because it could end up bad again.

"Hey," I said walking into the room and sitting on her bed next to her.

"Hi," Lucy said.

"What's up with you?" I asked her kindly.

"Nothing. What about you?" She asked me. What pisses me off is when people lie to me, I really hate it, especially if it's Lucy or someone close to me.

"Cut the bullshit, Lucy. Why?" I asked pointing to her wrist. She looked sad.

"What do you mean?" She asked. I knew she was trying to avoid the conversation.

"You promised me you wouldn't hurt yourself again." I said. Lucy looked at me she had tears welling up in her eyes.

"How'd you find out?" She asked me.

"Miles saw it." I told her.

"I, I know, I'm sorry." She said. I looked at her. All I wanted to know was why.

"But why?" I asked.

"Because I hate it, I hate it, Tegan, I hate it." She looked down at her shoes then back up at me. I was confused about what she meant she hate it.

"What do you mean you hate it?" I asked.

"Everything hurts. I don't know what to do. Don't get me wrong I love you and Andrew and the rest of the band but I can't stand being here. I hate how people treat me, like, like I'm just some kid." Lucy said. She was crying now. I put my arm over her shoulder and pulled her close to me. She was crying on my shirt.

"I get it, but Lucy you, you can't just isolate yourself from everyone else. I know it's hard. But you'll get over it. I know you will, if you don't I'll help you through it, just like last time. Okay?" I told Lucy.

"Okay. But don't tell anyone about all of this." Lucy told me.

"Of course, if you promise you won't hurt yourself I don't want you to go down the same road." I told her.

"Okay, promise," Lucy said but it sounded like she didn't really mean it.

"What do you want to do?" I asked her. I was rubbing her back softly trying to keep her calm.

"I want to get sleep," she said.

"Okay. Tomorrow do you want to practice just us two?" I asked her.

"Yeah, here though." Lucy said.

"Okay. See ya." I said walking out of her room. I closed the door and tears started streaming down my face. I whipped them off while walking down the stairs.

"Have a nice day." I said to Lucy's parents while walking outta the house.

"You too." They said. I started walking back to the apartment hopping the band is still there. I opened the door to see Mötley Crüe practicing.

"They're still upstairs, same as Mallory, she was waiting for you." Nikki said.

"Okay thank you." I said walking up the stairs into the bedroom.

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