Something Worth Fighting For

How long has it been... since he got impaled on that pike in the university? Is he dead or alive? He can't tell — he knows through shallow breaths, the waning yet enduring heat still encased in his body... and the sharp pain in his left side that he is still somewhat conscious in this cold physical wasteland.

Joel, unable to move so much as his neck, manages to squint open to take in the numbing comfort of what feels like being cocooned in thick fabric; a blanket.

Ellie...

Coughing out nails, he clears his throat and blinks a few times to force his vision to render faster. When it all sharpened, the first thing he sees, while moving his eyes around, are four corners of a ceiling and small sliding window spilling the darkening brightness of winter into what appears to be the basement of an unknown suburban house.

He can tell from the deafening silence that he is alone.

Venturing back to the archive of his more vague memories, the old man can replay scenes of Ellie desperately trying to shake him awake after falling off their horse near the end of fall. Another memory took him inside of mall where the girl stitched up his wound, her comforting voice keeping him from the edge of nothing.

He isn't too sure anymore of whatever awaits him on the other side as his life continues to dangle on that fine thread.

Now, he has no idea where he is, where Ellie is and whether she's even still alive; his throat is still too parched to attempt shouting.

Releasing a sigh, he imagines spores sprouting out of his mouth to fill the dense air — he might as well die already. Sure, he can feel life coming back to him like a scar fading, but until he can fully heal, he is utterly useless; if he can't even move anymore, he can't protect Ellie, so why bother fighting at all?

Is it hope?

Is it for the sake of survival?

Or... is it for her?

Perhaps all of the above.

It didn't cross Joel's mind until this point how much he had come to care for the girl. Not since twenty years ago when he lost Sarah did he fighting anything worth fighting for, other than a mere dirty deed or errand with Tess just to get by back in Boston — that's gone too.

Just a season ago, he couldn't wait to dump Ellie on Tommy so he could carry away all his responsibilities and having nothing to lose anymore — now, he can't fathom being away from her, especially for this long.

Where is she? Out hunting again? Did she run into any infected? Worse... what if she ran into more hunters? What if they have taken her?

Despite being lethargic, he is equally restless because of these thoughts oozing him with dread.

Knowing he can do nothing, he tries to bury his worries since they can't help him. He shuts his eyes again, hoping to let rest take him once more when a voice he recognizes yet shouldn't hear pulls him back.

"Daddy?"

Joel, willing some strength in his neck, turns his head to one side to see his late daughter, Sarah, sitting beside him with her legs crossed; her short blond hair, her navy eyes, her delicately small frame and the pajamas she wears is no different from the night he lost her.

"B—Baby girl..." he groans, his voice too silent for even a whisper. "Why... are you here?"

"I miss you." The child cocks her head to the side to give a radiant smile.

"Oh, Sarah... I'm so sorry." A lone tear trickles down the father's cheek. "I'm so s—sorry... I couldn't save you." He swallows. "I miss you even more."

"You still have my watch, I see." She looks down, as if able to see his wristwatch through the cover.

"How... could I not?" Joel faces up to the ceiling, wondering now where his life hangs. "So am I... dead now? Or this is all in my head?"

Sarah simply shrugged with a pout.

Joel can only chuckle to this before hissing again to the pain. "I wish I could go back... back before all this happened."

"You can't." The blonde suddenly answers, adopting a stern tone. "You told me once that you can only move forward."

"I want this to all be a dream." They lock eyes once more. "I want to wake up and find myself sitting next to you on our couch again, but..." He tightens his eyes shut. "I know that won't happen."

He revisits that ordeal in the university, still able to experience how his life was steadily ebbing away while Ellie covered him until they reached the exit.

"It should've ended there..." He grunts and forces his eyes back open. "I don't know... why I'm still here... still fighting."

"Don't give up." Sarah places her soft hand on her dad's chest. "You taught me that, remember?"

The man shuts his jaw, unable to argue with that point, especially coming from her.

When the pain resides, more questions coat him like a layer of snow, and he has to get them off before the pile can thicken.

"Tell me this," he begins. "what's it like... to be on the other side?" Sarah can only cast her eyes down. "Is it really like those bibles say? Is it peaceful up there? Do you really get to see everyone you've lost along the way?"

From the way she wordlessly lays down so that their heads are parallel, he knows she either can't or won't give him those answers. Still, her presence, although imaginary, is enough to soothe his ache.

"I love you."

"I love you too, daddy." Sarah smiles one last time before letting her lids draw shut to rest beside him. "We'll see each other again."

Absorbing those last words, Joel allows fatigue to take him once more, his breaths relaxing finally.

Right then, he hears a door upstairs creak open, and a round of tiny footsteps hurrying down towards him; he doesn't need to open up again to know, much to his relief, that it's Ellie.

Unlike with Sarah, he can barely register the other girl's words, though he does catch him calling his name, and a few other tidbits of her assuring him of the medical supplies she managed to salvage.

Afterwards, when Ellie lies down beside him on the other end and puts her own hand over his heart as well, all the pain he's endured can now be forgotten.

"No matter what... you find something worth fighting for."

With this in mind, Joel can now escape from this harsh reality, nestled between the two most important girls in his life.

THE END.

*****

A/N: I took inspiration from a fanart that I saw in Deviantart awhile ago and decided to make a short fic about it.

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