Dorn: A Star Wars Story

42. Pathfinders

"You plan to do what?" Thesh blinked and stared at me as we met in his meeting room aboard the Apalis. "Dorn... you do know that most people who go to the Unknown Regions die horrible, gruesome deaths?"

"I do," I folded my arms over my chest and paced back and forth in front of the table, my boots hitting the floor over an over again the only sound in the room. "But I need to know why Venn needed these wayfinders. What was he looking for? If we find it first..."

Thesh sighed and stood back, running a hand back through his hair, "I... You're right, of course, but... I don't feel good about this. How do you even plan to get there, though?" He gestured to the wayfinder and shook his head. "Even with those coordinates, you would need an extremely skilled navigator or be a Force Sensitive, and while I have no doubt in your marvelous skills when it comes to land navigation, I feel like "terror beyond the fringes of known space" is slightly outside of your skillset."

"I think you might be right," I sighed as I stopped pacing. "Thoughts?"

Thesh threw his hands up, "Dorn... I think you may have finally found the singular topic on which I can give you no sage advice."

I smiled, "Nothing?"

"Don't die?" he proffered with an easy shrug. "Sadly, nothing more tailored to your direct situation."

"You're all heart, Thesh."

"Just being practical."

I made my way back to the Summa with less of an idea as to what to do than I did before, only now I was at a complete loss. I stopped in my tracks when I saw Nyra inventorying gear. She heard the door open and looked up to see me, her eyes widening a bit in surprise at my presence that deep in the bowels of our segment of the destroyer. "Dorn," she blinked and lowered her pad.

"Nyra..." I hadn't spoken to her since Dokaas had taken her in do perform his surgery. I wasn't feeling able to look her in the eye after what happened to Horran. To my surprise, she greeted me with a smile. "How are you?"

"That's... a loaded question, Dorn."

"Alright. Break it down for me then."

"Physically? Been better, but Doc said I'd be back to full strength in a week with regular bacta soaks. Mentally..." She paused and cats her eyes downward, "Yeah. Been a lot better."

"I'm..."

"If you say sorry," she held up her hand and looked at me with a shake of her head, "I will personally bludgeon you to death." She watched my face with a sigh, "Naven did his duty, and you did what you could to save him while I was bleeding out in that droid. Nobody blames you."

"It's my job to keep you all alive," my reply was acrid, and I could almost taste the bitterness on my tongue when I spoke.

She watched me carefully before she closed the distance between us, "Dorn, this is a war. You can't save us all."

"I lost everyone in the last one," I looked up at her with a shake of my head again. "I won't let that happen again."

"Ahuff is alive, Dorn," Nyra took me by my upper arms and shook her head. "So is Kaine. And Farthen. And Peek. You didn't make it out alone. Beating yourself up over it will only drag you down."

"Aurek died in my arms, Nyra!" I shook my head as the memories of Jakku came flooding back again like an unwanted wave. "I wouldn't have even made it off of Mimban without and him I let him die! He's dead - Besh, Osk, all three of them - and for some reason, I'm still standing here!"