The Game of Love

Chapter 3

Trigger Warnings:
- Death
- Guns
- Violence
- Blood
- Cursing
- Anxiety
- Arguing

...

The crunching of the gravel under the wheels was the only thing that could be heard outside of the penetrating ring of dread. The black car with tar tinted windows and fake plate slinked silently around the street corner with Ambrose in the driver, Ann in the passenger, and Ruth in the back to the left. Since getting in the car they haven't spoken a word. Talking felt like digging the knife deeper into their skin. Like somehow a conversation would make everything they felt just explode into an unforeseeable disaster. It wasn't like saying something would change anything anyways. As soon as John slid that gun to Ruth, their fates were sealed. Tonight, in an act of honor, on Lotus's Hood day, each of them would have to succumb to this life and fall into the roles they were always meant to play. For the first time, Ruth was going to kill someone. She was going to hold this gun to Casey Hart's head and shoot him. Actually end his life. And Ann and Ambrose would be spectators to it. Ann would be extra protection and Ambrose the getaway. But those roles weren't really why they were there. No, they were there to represent loyalty. Family. The Lotuses. It wasn't about them actually being there, but, like Aunt Val says, the principle. It was like by being present, they were responsible for the murder too. And they'd either succeed or burn together. No words could fix this. No matter which way Ruth looked at it, she knew she didn't want to do this. She knew she didn't want to be responsible for ending someone's life. She knew that she'd rather be anywhere else than this car. And she also knew that there was no way to get out of this.
Ann's hands shook at the reality that her sister was about to kill someone. She imagined it and her heart squeezed. Anybody would be upset by their sibling killing someone. But this was different. Ann couldn't help but to feel sad for the present Ruth, who she knew would die alongside Casey because no one walks away from their first hit the same, but it was even worse knowing she was next. She knew one day she'd have to kill too. And so would Ambrose. Maybe even Goose, who knew the basis of what was happening tonight and was willing to be there, but the other three wouldn't allow it. Goose didn't have to be a part of this. Or any of it. Just being their friend Goose was putting himself in an imperial amount of danger and yet he was the most loyal person any of them have ever met. They promised to contact him when it was over, but that was all. There was no sense in ruining Goose like they were about to be ruined themselves. They knew this day would come, so it wasn't a surprise. They just didn't expect it to come so soon. They weren't ready, but they had to do it anyway.
Trying to escape the situation was pointless. John and Harley would never let their own children walk away from something like this and the whole gang would view their failure as irredeemable weakness. Walking away could ruin everything. No matter what one day they'd have to do this again. One day they'd have to kill again. And probably again. And again. They were going to run the Lotuses one day. This was going to be their life forever, whether Casey died or not they'd have to kill someone, someday. Running away now wasn't going to change that. All it would do is make everything so much worse. But maybe it would also allow Ruth to keep her innocence just a little bit longer. Just a little bit... Finally the car rolled to a stop.
For a moment Ruth hadn't even noticed that the car wasn't moving anymore. She stared down at the gun in her hands. Even through her leather gloves she could feel how cold the metal was. It felt like a million tons in her hand. The heaviest thing she's ever held. Ruth's mind began to wander. Maggie's family were mourning her right now. She was mourning her right now. Maggie would never get to graduate high school. Or go to prom. Or have her first kiss. Or get married. Or get her first job. She'd never make it past fourteen just like Jaylen would never make it past eight. Her life was cut short and now all her potential was gone, only replaced with what ifs. And it was Casey's fault. He killed Maggie. But what about Casey's family? Would they mourn him? Does he want to graduate? Or go to prom? Or get married? Or...live? Ruth would be responsible for stealing his future just like he's responsible for stealing Maggie's. Even though she should want to do this. She should want revenge. She doesn't want to be a killer. She doesn't want to be the reason someone dies tonight. If Casey was murdered by someone else, or involved in some accident that took his life away then Ruth probably wouldn't feel bad. But him dying and her killing him are two different things. She couldn't ever forgive him, but that didn't mean she wanted to kill him. She didn't want to become Casey just to get rid of him.