More Random ELO Incorrect Quotes

Goofy Fellers

Richard: You have Crayons?
Melvyn: Yes, I have—
Richard: You're— how old are you?
Melvyn: YES I AM AN ADULT AND I HAVE CRAYONS, I HAVE A BOX OF EMERGENCY CRAYONS IN THE CABINET UNDER THE TV BECAUSE EVERYBODY NEEDS CRAYONS SOMETIMES, OKAY? EVERYBODY NEEDS CRAYONS.

Jeff: How long do you think it'll take?
Richard: I don't know, three or four.
Jeff: Three or four what? Days? Weeks? Months?
Richard: Yeah, maybe five.
Jeff: Five what?!

Bev: When will Ted himself...finally show up to the talk?
Jeff: The final boss.
Richard: You guys know TEDtalks stands for technology, entertainment, and design talks, right?
Bev: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer!

Bev: Jeff, what do you value about Richard?
Jeff: He's thoughtful. He picks flowers and brings them to me. Often they're ones I've just planted, but...
Richard: That's how I know they're fresh!

Melvyn: Hey, wanna hear a funny joke?
Hugh: I only like dark humor.
Melvyn, turning the lights off: What do you call a fake noodle?
Hugh:
Melvyn: An IMPASTA!

Hugh: Is there something you would like to say, Melvyn?
Melvyn: Oh, there are SEVERAL things I would like to say.

Richard: What do you call quantums of electromagnetic radiation that don't get along?
Bev: What did you just say-
Richard: Foetons! *Laughs*
Bev: Wh-what?

Kelly: If I run and leap at Bev, he will most certainly catch me in his arms.
Kelly, running towards Bev: Coming in!
Bev: No! I'm holding coffee!
Bev: *Drops coffee and catches Kelly*

Melvyn: Hugh just said "I have an appetite for destruction" and then he reached down and untied my shoe.

Bev: I know what you're up to.
Melvyn: Really? Because I barely know.

Hugh: You are, of course, wondering why it is I have brought you here tonight.
Jeff: Actually, Hugh, after all these years, I just sort of go with it.

Melvyn: When life gives you lemonades, make lemons! Life will be all like "whaAttT?"
Mik: Life lessons that schools can't teach you.

Richard: Oh, they left the bowl out?
Richard: It says, "Take two pieces of candy."
Hugh: Nobody around though...
*Hugh grabs the entire bowl and runs off with it*
Richard: NO—

Hugh: So the other day I sent Melvyn out to get us some gas.
Hugh: And instead of getting gas, he got us novelty cookie cutters.
Hugh: Now everything we eat is shaped like a dinosaur.
Hugh: ...
Hugh: I love him so much.

Melvyn: *venting endlessly to Richard about his week*
Richard, every once in a while: *in a monotone* Wow, that is so wild.

Bev: Do we have any orange juice left?
Hugh: *pours the remaining juice into his cup*
High: Sorry, we're all out.

Jeff: Are you listening to me?
Hugh: *nods*
Jeff: What did I just say?
Hugh: *nods*
Jeff: ...

Jeff: Oooh, a train!
Richard: We're in a train station, Jeff.

Melvyn: Time freezes for everyone but you one day. What do you do?
Hugh: Oh... I'd mildly trouble everyone.
Melvyn: Alright, so what would you do?
Hugh: I'd shave a one-inch thick line in every thick beard I saw.
Hugh: I'd twist all the lightbulbs just a little bit so no one would know when they aren't working.
Hugh: I'd make every wing on girls eyeliner just a little bit higher than the other one.
Hugh: And I'd tie everyone's shoelaces together.
Hugh: And then lastly, I'd snip a little hole in every tea bag.
Melvyn:
Melvyn: Remind me to never allow you to have power.

Bev: You know, it's fine to admit you were wrong.
Hugh: *Sipping his drink after accidentally adding salt* I just like the way it tastes.

Mik: The first time Melvyn opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside he yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"