𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐘 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐃 ━━ harry potter

chapter fifty-eight

Ben really did try his best to ignore his doubts about Harry and Mei-Xing, but he still failed miserably. He couldn't help but continue thinking about it, over and over again, wondering when he had gone wrong. When it had gone wrong.

What hurt him wasn't the fact that he fancied someone else now. Well, yes it did, there was no point in lying... But what made it far worse was the fact that Harry hadn't given any signs of it. Or maybe he had, and Ben hadn't noticed. He obviously didn't expect him to go and tell him directly, he didn't owe him an explanation on his feelings.

But he could've at least stopped acting as though he still fancied him. He could've distanced himself from him, despite how little he wanted it to happen, or at least not told him that 'I needed you', or that 'I get to have you hold my hand' bullshit.

He didn't feel like he had the right to be jealous or hurt about it, but he couldn't control his feelings anyway. He deserved it. He couldn't simply expect Harry to wait forever, despite the fact that he had said he would wait as long as he had to. He was probably not thinking clearly.

He wasn't going to blame him for something he had said months ago, when he was probably blinded by the nerves of the second task the next day.

If he didn't want him anymore, it was okay. He understood it. He wasn't going to intervene. Especially not now that it looked like Mei-Xing liked him back, and was probably willing to actually go out with him. And wasn't ashamed or scared of it.

Besides, he really cared about her. He wanted her to be happy, now that Cedric was gone. If Harry made her feel better, who was he to try to steal him from her? That would be unfair of him.

So, since Harry didn't seem to want to distance himself from him, he made sure to do it himself. Both to let him know that he respected his decision, and to make it easier for him to try to get together with Mei-Xing. And also because it was starting to hurt to look at him, and feel a wave of images of Harry and her together hit him.

He spent the rest of the weekend with Thomas and Leah, which, once again, led to him finding out about what felt like hundreds of different gossip from everyone at school. Thomas told Ben all about his and Theodore's... not-relationship? He didn't know what was the best word to describe it, honestly, and neither did Thomas himself. But the thing was; they both seemed to like each other, so they sometimes met at night.

"I just don't like the way that he pretends to not be more than your housemate when you're in public," commented Leah, sitting under a tree beside the lake, one afternoon.

"Well, you can't expect him to go and kiss me in front of everyone, Leah."

"Of course not," she rolled her eyes. "But there's a difference between acting like you're only friends, and barely looking at you when you walk past each other in the corridors..."

"I'm with her on this one," agreed Ben.

Thomas frowned. "Well, I don't know, I really do like him. And he's very sweet to me when we're together."

"As he should."

"But he should be kind as well during the day, when there's other people around."

"He's just not ready to make it official yet, okay? But I know he will, and things will be different, then. And I'm going to wait for him."

Ben got a chill down his spine.

Thomas turned to Leah. "By the way, does he know...?"

"Know what?" he asked.

Leah shook her head. "Oh, no, he doesn't!"

"What?"

"I've got a girlfriend," she announced, grinning.