Sunshine

No more Suffering

He can love

He will love

He will not turn this feeling into a poison

Rather a lesson

That will live in pages of mind forever

To remind him

Himself is the only thing

He needs

But those moments will be cherished

As one

As one

As one

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"Good Morning to me" He smiles warmly just like a sunflower rose from the sunlight. while rubbing his eyes. No more tears. Only a soft smile. Thats all. Clear evidence he doesn't cry his heart out. He wasn't feeling a void.

As Porchay wakes up to the feeble dawn light filtering through the curtains, he takes a deep breath, sensation, a feeling of serenity settling within him.

He looked at the Mirror in front of the bed.

There is no denying that memories of Kim still linger in his mind, the love they shared, the laughter, and the moments that once filled his heart just like when he woke up in his safe and warm embrace, Crushing down to nothing but nuisance. Yet, After all he worshipped him as an idol for the longest. Being in a relationship with an idol was already a bluff fantasy if someone may ask.

Regardless he will Adore those instants as a lesson, That life gives. Porchay is now going to protect himself. From the cruel world. From the cruel. And love is a part of him. That makes him. Him. Love cannot be taken. And he will not turn this feeling into a poison for life. He will love. Not now but soon.

Today everything feels different. Today, there's a spark of something fresh, a glow of hope dancing in his eyes.

There's no need to rebel. No need to dye hair blue. No need to drink alcohol to forget. No need to lock himself in the depression.

Porchay has already forgiven Kim in silence. He will never stop loving. But he will not be gullible.

Soon He made his way toward his hia's and his living room from the stairs. The light illuminated from the big mirror windows. No more Chaos. It was all peace. Just like his heart beating peacefully.

Still, there was no Porsche, making breakfast for both of them.  However, Porchay understands. He understands that His big brother is happy. He also needs to be happy. And he is happy there. After sacrificing his whole life to him. In quite a literal manner. But he wasn't merry there so he moved out.

Chay chugs down a glass of water and Eats a light breakfast.

"I should go for a Morning walk"  Decides to start his day with a walk in the park. In the hustle and bustle of Bangkok city, there were still some places left to enjoy nature and alone time.
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The gentle rustling of leaves and the chirping of birds create a soothing melody that surrounds the little park.

With each step he takes, he feels a weight lifting off his shoulders, a sense of freedom washing over him. He took slow moves appreciating the whole scenery in front. Inhaling the freshness of the day.

The beauty of nature reminds him of the simple pleasures in life, the ones that are eternally there, waiting to be welcomed.

Finally Settling on a bench overlooking a small yet beautiful pond, Porchay closes his eyes and lets the sun's zeal crease his face. Vitamin D. He should take it as much as possible. There was once a time when he ignored his health. Not anymore.

As the soothing breeze brushes his cheeks, recalls the love he shared with Kim just like this soothing breeze.

"Free" he whispered. There's a bittersweet ache in his soul, a longing for what once stood. But amidst the remembrances, there's a fruition that he can still love profoundly while moving forward.

Porchay will Love WIK as an artist. Artist he once admired nothing more nothing less.

Unexpectedly he watches a family of ducks waddle by, longing welled up inside him.

"Even the ducks seem to remind me of us." but there was only Appreciation in his tone. Appreciation for the love he experienced, for the sermons learned, and for the strength he's discovering within himself.

Pink Cherry blossoms that were lingering in the air fell on Chay's hair. Making him look at the sky it was vast. With opportunities.
Porchay sighed lightly and said "I miss you, P'Kim. Your presence still lingers in every corner of my heart."

*DING*
Macau
Let's Go and Make some Pottery Buddy!!

Porchay's phone buzzes with a text from a friend inviting him to a pottery class. Even though he was also a theerapanyakul, Macau was like him, lost but slowly finding his way in the world.

A friend that is not like the ones he lost along the way. Those were only Lost due to their egoism. Lost due to Kim who helped him realize that they were destructive. A bad influence. Irony. Nevertheless Intrigued by the idea of trying something new, he decides to take hold of the opportunity.
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"Ah the texture is Funny" He laughed a genuine laugh. Not the one he needed to cover his sadness but to let his heart feel the happiness, As he tried to make something while Macau joined him beside.

The sensation of clay between his fingers, the shaping of something lovely from a formless chunk, echoes with him on a deeper level.

It was a metaphor for his own voyage of shaping his destiny, molding it into something meaningful and fulfilling.

In the junctures of quietness between shaping clay, Porchay's mind drifts back to Kim. He remembers their shared dreams, the whispered promises of teaching guitar and writing songs as forever.

And yet, in this creative latitude, there is an energy that ignites his soul. The act of creation becomes purifying. To him to his soul. He was Free from the gloom. Porchay Kittisawasd was ready to move on. No more suffering, in silence.

"I'll always cherish our love P'Kim. But now, I'm learning to love myself" he said under his breath and started to mould back the clay.

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A/N- I never saw a one-shot solely on Porchay and his decision if he moved one. Maybe this was enough to give a small insight into it. Though it was rushed I felt like all the feelings were shared just right.

Lovesick and Insane will be updated After March ends as I have Finals right now.

Thank you

Have a good day :)

Happy unit day to all 🌟