Thoughts of love

A\N: This is not a Happily Ever after type story, this is a tragic romance. This is what I believe what Will would be thinking as he lay bleeding to death on the court room floor. I have no idea why I'm writing this but you'll need tissues to read this one, Angels. If you thought The last chance was heartbreaking, this one will be worse. I hope you enjoy, Angels. 

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Will Gardner didn't believe in love at first sight like his sisters did. Love at first sight was meant to be in Disney movies and romance books, not in real life. 

That was until he laid eyes on Alicia Cavanaugh in Georgetown, at the 1L midnight pool party. 

When he laid his eyes on the brunette girl across the pool, he knew he had found The One for him. 

When they first spoke, when he first heard her voice speaking to him, he fell even more in love with Alicia Cavanaugh. 

He sat in front of her in Criminal Law 101, and therefore became study partners and friends. They became inseparable. They did everything together until they were named 'Mr and Mrs Georgetown' even though they weren't together. 

Will knew as long as he had Alicia Cavanaugh by his side, he could do anything, including graduating Law School and becoming a lawyer. 

If it weren't for Alicia, he wouldn't have passed 1L, let alone law school. 

She pushed him to do better, she pushed him to do more than the bare minimum.

Even though he fell in love with her the moment he laid eyes on her, he fell more and more in love with her everyday, every minute, every second he spent with her. He learned things about her that he's never forgotten. He knows more about her than he does anyone else, including his own sisters and every little thing he learned about her made him fall in  love with her even more. 

He learned that she still takes her coffee regular with three sugars and a splash of milk, depending on how much sleep she had the night before. 

He learned that she liked any kind of chocolate. 

He learned that she liked wine more than beer.

He learned that she loved puppies.

He learned that she loved waking up on her terms.

He learned that red was her favourite colour, and he couldn't argue with that: she still does look hot and sexy as hell in the colour. 

He learned that she was a night owl.

He learned that she did her best work under pressure.

He learned not to underestimate her.

He learned that he never wants to be on the receiving end of her temper. 

He learned that he never wanted to be near anyone who recently got their ass handed to them by Alicia Cavanaugh. 

He learned to always carry tampons and chocolate with him if he wanted to live to see passing the Bar. 

He learned to never step in when anyone was upsetting her. 

But most of all, he learned how strong and independent she was, and he loved her even more. 

The day they graduated Georgetown, it was full of tears, and cheers, and hugs, and one last pool party with the two of them jumping in together. holding hands, squealing. She was wearing a red bikini, when they surfaced, both dripping wet, wearing matching smile and tears in their eyes as they hugged in the pool surrounded by their friends, Will Gardner fell in love with Alicia Cavanaugh all over again like he did three years earlier at their first pool party. 

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15 years after he  graduated Georgetown with Alicia at his side, he saw her on TV, a day or so after her husband's sex tape and corruption scandal came out and he hated the look on her face: withdrawn, tired, devastated. Whoever knew Alicia from school, and he did, knew that is was an act she was putting on for the camera's, for the press, supporting her husband for the sake of her kids, Zach and Grace, but behind the scenes, she hated him, that Peter Florrick had broken the unbreakable Alicia Cavanaugh. 

And no one had ever broken her. Until her own husband had accomplished the unaccomplishable.

Six months after the tape, and the scandal, and Peters indictment and his trial, he bumped into her in the elevator of Stern, Lockhart and Gardner, and when their eyes locked, all the love he had felt for her, the love he had locked away for 15 years behind a unpenetrated vault behind his heart, came to the surface, and when she smiled at him for the first time since law school, the smile she was wearing when he first laid eyes on her,  he fell in love with Alicia Cavanaugh like he did 18 years ago. 

When he left those two voicemails on her cell, telling her that he loved her, that he had loved her since Georgetown, he had waited by his cellphone for three hours. 

As long as he knew Alicia Cavanaugh, she only broke his heart twice: when she ignored his second voicemail, and when she ended their affair. 

But despite her breaking his heart twice, he still loved her.

Even as death slowly takes him away from the world, away from the law, away from his firm, away from Diane, away from Kalinda, away from Cary, away from Alicia, god Alicia, he can see her smile. The same smile she was wearing 20 years ago at that pool party, the one that makes him fall in love with her all over again. 

Through the pain, and fading away, he can hear her screaming,  he can hear her screaming him, he can hear her screaming  his name, he can hear her screaming for him. 

"I love you, Will!" Alicia screams at him. 

"I love you too, Alicia!" His mind screams at him. He wants to scream it back to her, tell her that he's sorry for how he's been treating her these past couple of weeks but he can't, he can't speak, he can't say the the four words he's been wanting to say for 20 years. 

"I'll love you forever!" Alicia screams as death claims him and takes him away from his Alicia. 

"I'm okay with that!" His mind says gently before death causes all forms of life to slip away from him, leaving him cold and lifeless on a court room floor with Alicia Cavanaugh sobbing and screaming on him before being picked up and carried away from him by Cary. 

"I've loved you for 20 years Alicia Cavanaugh, and I'll love you for 20 more, and however many more years it takes to see you again." Will Gardner says as he sees Alicia sobbing into Diane's shoulder in the lobby of Lockhart/Gardner. 

He'll love Alicia Cavanaugh for the rest of eternity.

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A\N: You'll never know if I cried while writing this one. I have a few more tragic romance Willicia stories I need to write as well as a few more Willicia and McHart stories in my drafts I need to write, so I have a full week next week. 

I hope you enjoy this one, Angels.