De Luca

16.Mixed emotions and Memories

16

The sun was already rising. The day before over but the memories still fresh.

Russia was much more beautiful than I ever thought it to be. Forsaken thoughts kept playing in my head but I shut it all in. Focusing on the present. I felt rather confiscated than ever now. A feeling that my safety passed with Stephan.

"Hey, Camila?" A sudden motion of a hand waving in front of my eyes woke me up. "Yes?" My voice was raspy from not talking and shame crept on me for an unknown cause.

There aren't any genuine reason why he has been accompanying me. Nothing particular. Maybe it's just that he pity me and feels sympathetic? There are millions of people getting into accidents every hours in a day.... maybe it's just that my case is special....

I glanced at Markus. His features were made more complex by the light peeking out from the window beside me. For a second , it brought me back - again - to the thoughts of Stephan.

Is it the way he treated me that made me feel special? Is it the way he looked at me as if there won't be no tomorrow and he had to remember every detail of my existence? Yes. He knew it, I assume. He knew there would be a crisis that could go the wrong way. He knew this is not permanent.

He swore to protect me with his life. He did.

I recalled his words. The last sentence he uttered, I'll come get you. He meant it, didn't he? He always had some truth behind his fantasy lies.

He'll prove it true. He'll prove what he said. He'll come back for me.

He won't die. He won't die, I assured myself.

"Camila? You still there?" waking up from my haze, mustering up the brightest smile I could in this possible situation, I replied. "Yes. Yes. What is it?" I was buoyant when it came to the fact that he was concerned. But I felt tired from just moving the muscles in my face to form a slightest smile and to speak. He looked at me worriedly before speaking up. "You seemed out of the world today. I called you a hundred times but you didn't hear... Is it about Mr. Luca?"

By hearing his name, mixed emotions ran wild inside me. I wanted him dead. And when he died I want him alive. I wanted freedom. But when I got it, when I could finally spread my wings, I wanted to be restrained in golden chains away from liberty. I wanted to find reasons to hate him. But now I wanted reasons why didn't I love him when I had the chance.

"No' I replied. "I'm just feeling under the clouds today. Just sleeplessness." I lied. He nodded in understanding and stood up. That's when I noticed we had already landed. I repeated his gesture and stood up.

A lot of procedures later.....

What is this place? I was standing in the balcony of Markus' apartment raking in the view before my eyes. He said he had to take some documents from his room before he reported to the department.

I don't know how many days I have to stay here and exactly why did the Russian police came to my rescue other than the italian ones. Maybe they have their own reasons....Didn't they?

"I'm back. Shall we go?" Markus' voice startled me and my grip around the railing became firm. My shoulders tensed and I turned around. "Can I get a glass of water please?" Were the first thing that came to my mouth and graciously nodded and lead the way towards his kitchen.

His apartment was ten times bigger than mine. With sleek and modern furnishings and designs. Everything was clean and perfectly placed compared to a mess of my room.

I flinched from the memory of my home sweet home. An involuntary sigh left my mouth. "You 'kay?" I nodded, nodding had become a habit ever since I left Italy. I was soo tired of hearing my voice say dumb stuff which I didn't want myself to tell anyone. "Just tired" I lied again.

He handed me the glass of water and I downed it in one gulp. My dry throat felt replenished and lively. "Let's go" I said. People be investigating me when it was my job to investigate people. Life, the only explanation to this story.

He opened the door for me.

"Wow. What a gentleman. Where's manners, Mr. Luca? Didn't they teach you to open the door for a lady?" I remember myself asking. "I don't consider you as a lady and....Well don't you have two hands that are working perfectly, Ms. D'mello?" A distant voice. And I could tell that it was from my head.

Before it gets worse I need to take the meds. I kept the thought to my self cause, as everyone know, I'm penniless. (bgm- moye, moye)

We took the elevator down to the parking lot. A golden thread of tension hanging between us. But no-one questioned it.

Ignorance is a bliss.

He walked towards a blue Aston Martin with me behind his back. A deep feeling of nostalgia hit me.

"Aston Martin" I mumbled and he hummed. "Say please" and as I glared at him again I could see him trying to fight off the smirk creeping up onto his face. "No" i snapped "never"

I just wanted to curl up and vent to someone but I knew this was not the time.

What if they ask what's my relation with Stephan during the questioning session?

Personal assistant. My inner voice replied.

Yeah....that's quite true. I forgot what was my occupation for a moment.

He opened the car door for me too. And I truly felt like pitying myself. I scoffed mentally, feeling useless.

"You never asked where are we, Ms. D'mello." He looked at me for a second before turning his attention to the road as we got out of the parking area. I find myself questioning, why had that thought never appeared to me? "Where are we, though?" A slightest curl of his lips showed satisfaction that I was curious. "St. Petersburg" he replied. "That Russian revolution place?" I had learned about it in school. I have no idea why. He let out a small chuckle. And heat rose up to my cheek.

Damn that must have been stupid...

"Yes, the Russian revolution place" he said in between his uncontrollable grin. "I'm sorry." His hands met mine when he said. "It's just that you're adorable" he took away his hand and I have to say that I completely ignored that comment throughout the whole ride and was trying hard to focus on the colourful buildings flashing in front of my eyes.

After a long ride, my eyes were dropping shut. The car came to a halt and that's when I noticed, we're already here.

"Can you wait here till I park my car?" I removed the seatbelt as I nodded and got out of the car.

A massive building with gigantic doors awaited me.

Well, this is gonna be a long journey through that very 'jovial' tragedy happened a day ago.