all credits to @/erwinsvows on tumblr!!
You creep carefully into Rafe's bedroom, pushing the already-open door gently with your palm. Your eyes dart around, worried he's going to be just around the corner, but you're greeted with nothing—just the empty space that belongs to Rafe.
How exactly did you get yourself into this? It had started a few hours ago—at least that's what you thought. You didn't have any clue what Sarah and her new friends were up to, you were just over for a pre-planned girls night that was dismissed the second you walked into Tannyhill. Instead, Sarah asks for a favor, one that you deny almost immediately.
"You'll be in and out, it won't take more than a minute-"
"I am not sneaking into Rafe's room for you, Sarah. What if he-he catches me? Finds me in there? What am I gonna say?"
"He's not gonna be home later, I promise. It'll be a second, and he's always liked you most out of all my friends so he won't even care-"
Your face flushes at the very sentence. Her brother, Rafe, the one that you've only interacted with on chance occasions, the one who makes your heartbeat speed up anytime he's in the vicinity, that very Rafe, has always liked you?
You're too caught up in that thought and its implications to even question Sarah anymore. Her new friends—Pogue friends, ones that you don't know and aren't sure how long they've known her—linger by the door. They seem eager to make sure that you agree.
You're being moved around the board like a chess piece but you can't find it in yourself to care. It's shallow, you know, as one thought circulates through your mind, body, and bloodstream—Rafe has always liked you.
A hazy, dreamy mist settles over you. You agree to Sarah, feeling increasingly stupid as you settle into the living room and keep your eyes on the television. She left with her friends, and when Rafe comes down, you're supposed to tell him you're waiting for his sister. Once he leaves, you need to sneak into his bedroom to find a map they seem to desperately need. One of the boys suggests it'll be in his sock drawer.
"It's not a porn magazine, JJ, why would it be there-"
"Oh, um, I don't know, just that it's the number one male hiding spot-" "What studies are you basing this off of?"
"A little thing called the study of life, Pope-"
You had interrupted them yourself, reassuring that you'll look in his dresser and his desk.
But now, walking into Rafe's bedroom, you're losing all your nerve. You've thought about this before—you'd be lying to yourself to deny it. Any girl who has a best friend with a cute older brother has too. In the summers you sleep at Tannyhill more often than your own house, but you still could have never imagined this would be the reason you're in Rafe's room for the first time.
The house is silent, just like Sarah had told you. Mr. and Mrs. Cameron out at the country club, Wheezie at the beach, Sarah supposedly with you but actually with those Pogues. She says Rafe is gone too, driving around somewhere with his friends, and you believe her without a second thought.
But you do have a second thought, and it's the fact that this is so beyond wrong.
Looking through Rafe's belongings with your eyes, your hands start to tremble at the idea of touching something of his without his permission. You want to swallow your nerves to do this for your friend, but you hesitate, hands hovering over the drawer to his dresser.
For a second, you want to puke, worried that you'll open this drawer to find porn magazines like John B had said, or worse—photos of one of his girls that you really don't want to see.
