Wait how the fuck (COTL self insert)

🪱 𝓘𝓷𝓽𝓻𝓸𝓭𝓾𝓬𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 🪱

  ｡*✧—————✧,,pɐq sʞ๏๏l ʇɐɥʇ 'sǝʞıʎ,,✧——————✧*｡

Blood.

🩸

Blood.

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Blood.

🩸

    Theres tons and tons of it. I know it was mine though, I mean, you'd know that too if there were literal worms bursting out of your stomach. Your own blood staining your favorite shirt and brand new cargo jeans that you bought 2 days ago. And man let me tell you, it SUCKS. And I'm not talking about the dying part- well, I am but also not.

       I'm more pissed about the way I'm dying, like are you kidding me? Worms? Worms of ALL the possible things in the universe? I don't care if these things are parasites or big ass hell that's still embarrassing!

   Couldn't I have died in a cooler more marvelous way? Ooh maybe by a totally badass raging robot? That's awesome AND not embarrassing. OH! Or by an epic battle to the death with an enemy, and I can be all like "You may have won this battle, but my legacy and words will carry on." As my last dying breath.

See? Now that's cool, not– not by these fucking worms.

Okay, so you're probably not wondering at all what I'm crying about. And that's fair but I'm still gonna explain what these worms are anyway.

These wet noodle fucks are called Abdominal Carnivo Worms, and that's mainly because they're only known for attacking your stomach. Reason for that being is that these fucks are usually hidden in food. Examples can vary, but the most common ones are in meats like pork, chicken or beef and what not.

    And because they get ingested they start to grow in your stomach, you can compare it to a tape worm but these things are more aggressive. And get this, they fucking multiply like crazy. Let's say you swallow one on accident cause only a dumbass would do it on purpose, just one and BOOM. All of a sudden in a week you've got worms the size of yard stick coming out of you like a fucked up zombie baby.

"Isn't the government doing something to make sure these things don't happen?"

   Yeah yeah I hear ya, and yes they sorta did.
The government and food policies started bitchin' at restaurants and shops to wash and check the food before putting it on shelves or serving it. Making sure that it's not infected with the little things. Unfortunately that's not always gonna be the case. That's kinda shitty too now that I think about it cause it's just that one thing and nothing else.

     I mean c'mon! I'm a literal example of this shit— hell why am I even explaining shit to.. wait who am I talking to? Am I going insane? Do the worms make a person go crazy once they're in the person? Aw hell no what the fuck man!? first a absolute fuckin' bozo death and now I'm going mental? This ACTUALLY sucks!

   I guess alternatively it could have been worse. Is dying by worms less embarrassing that other deaths in history? Heard a guy died from laughing a lot from a drunk donkey so maybe I am better? Ah, who am I kidding.
Being K.O'd because of a worm is fucking sad.

       At least it's not gonna be for long then. I'm already feeling the bloodloss and my body shutting down. Oh hey, maybe that's why I'm talking to no one. Or maybe just dying in general makes you do that? I don't know.

Oh.
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Yeah I think I'm passing away now.
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It's ..

It's real dark, and real cold.
sorta comforting? Kinda like falling deep into the ocean and letting it sway you away. Or being in the rain while laying down in a empty field..

this isn't so bad.

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Hold on is that a fucking tree??