falling [zarry] ✔️

xxxiii

"So?" Harry asks when the lasts notes trail off in what he thinks is a fairly amazing album.

He looks at Zain, who's laying on the floor in the studios, eyes closed. He could be asleep if Harry didn't know him so well.

"I like it," Zain says, opening his eyes slowly to look at Harry.

"Which one is your favourite?" Harry asks, because he has to. Because Zain has his hand in most of them, somehow, but there is one this is for Zain, about him and Harry is unreasonably attached to it. He wants Zain to like it.

"Hm," Zain makes, sitting up slowly.

His hair is a mess. Harry swallows against the tightness in his throat and the way his heart seems to want to burst out of his chest.

"I like the Ghosts and the Bullets," he says like he doesn't know the titles as well as Harry. Harry rolls his eyes, because of course he would. "But I think Falling," he adds, making Harry's heart leap. "You haven't played that for me before."

"Well," Harry says, shrugging, giddy. "Had to keep a surprise for you. I'm glad you like it," he adds, softer, playing with a loose thread on his track bottoms. "I wanted to ask," he says, biting his lips. "It feels weird not acknowledging you at least somewhere. So I was wondering if you wanted to have a pseudonym so I can put you somewhere and so people know it wasn't just me, you know."

Zain sits forward slightly, a weird look on his face. He clears his throat, running a hand through his hair.

"Yea," he nods. "I would like that."

"Good," Harry sighs in relief. He wanted to share this with Zain, in whatever way Zain felt comfortable with, however he could. "Do you have any idea what you want your pseudonym to be?"

"Maybe just Zayn," Zain grins. "With a Y."

Harry laughs, startled at Zain's mischief when the whole topic felt so heavy. "Hate to break it to you," he grins. "But I think that's not gonna be useful."

"Hm," Zain makes again, watching Harry with bright eyes. "You know," he says slowly. "When will you actually release it? Your album? The first single, whatever?"

"Not for another few months," Harry shrugs, frowning down at Zain. "Why's that matter?"

"Because," Zain says, standing up and leaning against the table in front of Harry, watching him.

Harry's heart stutters again, Zain's aftershave strong with the sudden closeness. He can almost feel Zain's warmth. "Because?" he asks, his voice a tad too high to be causal.

"I talked to Doniya. And then to my parents. And then my sisters. And then a whole lot of staff," Zain says and Harry wants to tell him to get to the point already.

Anticipation is buzzing under his skin like an electric current. He feels like his skin is too tight, like this is important in a way he doesn't even know.

"I'm gonna be leaving the whole royal family thing," Zain says before Harry can ask.

Harry gapes at him, a faint buzzing in his ears as Zain continues.

"It'll take some time still and we want to have a good timing because we wanna keep the speculations about a falling out as little as possible. But except for some minor details and an actual date we have figure it out. Doniya's wedding is in sixteen months so definitely within the next year. Enough time before to not pull focus but before so I can just come to the wedding as normal, no fuss and all."

"You're leaving?" Harry asks, trying to understand. "What does that mean?"

"It means," Zain says, brushing hair off Harry's forehead. Harry would feel hopeful if Zain didn't do this on a regular basis. "I won't have to think about the palace anymore. I can do what I want, as much as anyone can. It means I can make music and put my name on it, if I want to."

"Oh," Harry says, smiling brightly. "That's good. Zayn with a Y, that's cheeky."

"Hm," Zain grins, looking down at him. "It means a few other things as well," he says, brushing his thumb over Harry's cheek. "But I wanted to ask a favour first."

"What kind?" Harry frowns, biting his lip because hope was fluttering in his chest, bright and happy.

"You crashed in my flat for years," Zain says, eyes on Harry. "I thought I'd crash in your house in LA for a while. Everyone's agreed it'd be better if I were out of the country for a while, to let things die down. So I can leave the house maybe."

"Yea, of course," Harry says eagerly. "I'm coming with, we'll have the best time, I promise. You can stay as long as you want."

"As long as I want?" Zain grins, leaning forward slightly and stealing Harry's breath. "You sure?"

"Yea," Harry says dumbly and then doesn't say anything because Zain is kissing him and neither of them are drum or tired and he might be dreaming but Zain's kissing him and holding his face between his hands, gentle and firm and his lips are soft against Harry's.

"Oh," Harry says when Zain pulls back, watching him. His chest feels like it has exploded, his cheeks flushed with heat. He swallows and stares at Zain, caught.

"The other thing is," Zain says. "I'll be just like you. Too many paparazzi following me around, probably. But I can do what I want. And you can do what you want."

"Yes," Harry says before Zain can say anything else. He wants. He wants Zain so badly, forever.

Zain looks at him, amused, pressing a kiss to the corner of Harry's mouth. "Thank you," he says, nonsensically.

"What for?" Harry asks dumbly and then feels something like lead drop inside his gut. "Wait," he says, leaning back. "You're not leaving because of me, are you? Because, because that's —"

"Shush," Zain says, interrupting him with a quick press of his lips to Harry's. A kiss. Zain is kissing him.

"I'm leaving for myself, alright," Zain says, holding Harry's face between his hands and meeting his gaze head on. "I'm leaving because I never liked that life and I don't want to spend the rest of my life living it. And I know Doniya is taken care of. And Safaa is older now. The only thing you have done," he adds, gently, stroking his thumb over Harry's skin. "Is give me something outside that life and that's given me the courage, maybe, of leaving  it behind. I have something to look forward to. I needed to do this for myself, and I am doing it for myself. But I don't have to be alone with you."

"Never," Harry swears, looking up at him.

"Good," Zain grins, leaning down to kiss him again. "Now play your album again, love. I need to make sure I can really put my name on it."

"Mean," Harry says, but it comes out too soft. He's grinning too wide, leaning his cheek against Zain's chest as he pushes play again and closes his eyes to listen.

👑  the end 👑

I actually didn't think this would be the last chapter but... here we are?

There will be an epilogue, because I am incapable of not writing epilogues, but yea. We're done??

Also obviously this album is not HS1 because Zain plays too big a role, I'm sorry for all of you who are attached 😂