𝐒𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 (Milkman x Reader) That's Not My Neighbor

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐈

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐈

The New Doorman and
The Cunt

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" We called. "

" Yeah, I know, " you replied nonchalantly, glancing up from your crossword puzzle. " I watched it ring. "

The man inside the yellow hazmat suit shuffled on his feet, his hand finding its way to the top of his head as he let out a heavy, disappointed sigh.

" Okay, look, " he began, clearing his throat. " I'm going to need you to do your job properly, alright? We've received over 5 complaints about your behavior yesterday. "

" Oh, yes, " you agreed sarcastically, a smirk playing on your lips. " 5 complaints must be a record for this building, isn't it? " you added, hinting at the small number of tenants residing there.

" If you fixed your bathroom, your numbers would probably go up, " you suggested casually, returning your attention to the crossword puzzle in front of you. The bottom parts of the paper were crumpled from being in close contact with your torso.

" Wh-, " the man in the suit stammered, clearly taken aback. " Tenants have their own bathrooms; they don't really need to use the public one on this floor, " he explained.

" But I use it, " you countered, lifting an eyebrow. " Actually, let me emphasize that. I HAVE to use it. There's no other bathroom here, and it'd be very weird for me to walk up to someone's door randomly one day and ask if I can shit on their toilet, " you retorted.

" My job is very important, as if you haven't stressed that enough. I think I'm entitled to receive some sort of amenity for my honest, hard work, " you added.

The man in the hazmat suit groaned audibly, and you couldn't help but imagine him rolling his eyes. " Either befriend a tenant or clean the public bathroom yourself, " he instructed before turning on his heels and making his exit. " You'll need luck with both. "

" Asshole, " you muttered under your breath as he walked away.

You huffed, aggressively folding up the crossword puzzle and grumpily walking over to the trash bin, kicking it inside with more force than necessary.

" Mmm, is this a bad time? "

You jumped, quickly whipping your head back to see a tired-looking man on the other side of the glass. " Oh! No, not at all! " you stammered, rushing back to your seat. " How can I help you today? " you asked, despite your shock, you maintained a polite demeanor, hoping that the tenants would notice your efforts and report back to your boss, perhaps prompting them to finally clean the bathroom for you.

The man scratched his chin thoughtfully. " You must be the new hire. Congratulations on the new job, " he said politely, handing over his ID through the drop box.

" Francis Mosses, " you read aloud, noting the tired expression on his face. " Moses? Like, from the Bible? " you mused, but the man didn't reply. You quickly checked the rest of his details, confirmed his floor and room number, and let him on his way.