Love Me Dead

Trigger warnings: Suicide

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He killed. And he killed. And he killed. Body after body, night after night, he washed his blood-soaked hands in the same porcelain sink that now held a slight pink tinge. And body after body, night after night, he was left lying in his bed alone feeling pure exhilaration, bliss, and love. Love for something he could not have.

From the moment Will Graham had seen the soft smile Death had adorned on that otherwise bleak face - a smile just for him, he'd realized - he knew he was in love. A curse, Death had told him - only the most unfortunate few had suffered the same. According to Death, who appeared to him as a tall man with short blond hair and a neatly tailored suit, only those with a special kind of mind are able to feel this deeply connected to an entity neither here nor there.

"I saw the look on your face as I took hold of Garret Jacob Hobbs in that kitchen. I knew you were doomed from the moment you laid your eyes on me," He had told Will with that beautiful soft smile. "I cannot return that love, Will. It will only kill you in the end."

To which Will replied, "I do not care. I would kill and kill and kill again, just to see you for a moment."

And so he did exactly that. Almost every night now, Will Graham killed, all to see that soft smile on that handsome face for a mere few moments, hardly even exchanging words as He took the dead to wherever they go. He thought of that smile as he ripped into flesh and tore out bone, letting blood splatter himself and his surroundings.

But soon, that was no longer enough. His killing became reckless, and partially for the thrill. Eventually, he realized, he was going to kill himself. It was only a matter of time. He hadn't known just how literal Death had been in that moment in the kitchen, telling him this beautiful curse would drive him into the grave. And yet, just like that day, he simply could not care at all. For maybe, just maybe, this meant he could stay with Him.

This time Death seemed to understand what was on his mind as he came to collect Will's newest victim.

"You're becoming rather careless," Death began, smiling that soft smile that made Will want to kill all over again. "But I think you and I both know why."

And he was right - they both knew perfectly well exactly what Will was doing. He was killing himself - slowly but surely driving himself into madness, as if he wasn't already there to begin with. As if he hadn't gone mad that first moment in the kitchen, the first time someone else's blood covered his hands of his own volition. The first time he realized he enjoyed that feeling.

"Yes, we do." Will replied, breathing in. Death's beauty was as powerful as ever, captivating and haunting. It quite nearly physically drew him in. "But I think you and I both know I couldn't care any less." He added with a gentle smile and a downward tilt of his head.

"You're playing a dangerous game, Graham. One we both now you can not and will not win"

"I was doomed to lose from the start. You know that."

Death responded only with a solemn nod of his head, allowing that smile to once again grace over his hardened features. He gave Will one last look before taking hold of the deceased and disappearing, leaving Will standing alone in an alley, blood-soaked and shivering.

He waited two nights after that before killing again. He made this one especially violent, ripping and tearing in brutal downwards strikes with the same knife he used every time, making sure he was able to peer inside the poor man's chest. As the man lay dying, WIll reached his hand between his ribs and pulled out his heart, gripping it in his palm as he sat on the roof of the building and stared at it in waiting.

Death showed up precisely when WIll thought he would. One and a half minutes after the man had really and truly died. Will had never asked why he did that.

As Death looked at the scene before him, he simply sighed and stood over Will as the latter stood and turned his head up to stare Death in his eyes.

"I love you."

And he smiled at Death as he spread his arms and fell back, heart in hand, allowing his eyes to flutter shut and a gentle grin to spread upon his face just before he made impact with the concrete below. And could have sworn he saw Death smile too.

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