Autistic Characters in Love (Ray x Egon)

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria

Valentine's Day Stantzler Fluff (rated Teen) Originally published by me as Happy Valentine's Ray on AO3, February 2024

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria is an ADHD, AuDHD, cPTSD trait. It's a trauma response from repeated social rejection in the past. People with RSD can be extremely sensitive to feelings or disconnection. They fear and anticipate rejection, looking for signs it's coming.

There are many things Egon has come to know about Ray over their years of friendship. One of them is that Ray loves holidays. He loves the novelty and excitement of a special occasion. He likes presents, treats and a general fuss to be made.

Conversely, Egon hates holidays. Hates the break in routine and the disruption of schedule. The social expectations are bewildering. He doesn't like feeling pressured. He doesn't like to give presents because he struggles to pick the right thing to gift someone. He doesn't even like to receive presents because of the expectation to open them in front of the gift giver and do a performance about how grateful you are. Gifts are a nightmare.

They just got through the gauntlet of Christmas and Hannukah. But here it is, February. Valentine's Day is fast approaching and Egon doesn't know what to do for Ray.

Make a restaurant reservation? No. It will be too loud and crowded and the chef and servers will be too stressed to make accommodations for their food sensitivities. Another night.

A movie? Doesn't seem that special. They already hit the movies a couple times a month.

Drinking and dancing? Certainly not.

A Broadway show? Way too loud for Spengs. He could wear his ear plugs but it will be so bright and crowded. Why don't they make eye plugs? Further, Ray would know Egon hated it the whole time. It would dampen Ray's fun. This is why Ray takes Janine to Sunday matinees occasionally. They both love a big loud spectacle.

Puzzling over the issue like it's a calculus equation, Egon is frowning all morning. Not speaking much. Naturally, rejection sensitive Ray starts to think he's mad at him.

"Are you okay?" Ray asks Egon who is awfully grumbly and scowly. Stantz is feeling a little disconnected and uncertain because he doesn't know what this bad mood might be about. The mean voice in his head says it's his fault, whatever it is.

"Yes. Fine," says Egon, but he doesn't look over and notice the anxiety in Ray's eyes.

"You're not angry?" Ray asks.

"No," Egon says, irritated. He isn't angry. He's worried but does not want to talk about Valentine's Day and spoil any potential surprises. The social protocol says that boyfriends are supposed to plan dates independently and confidently.

Egon is quietly imploding and Ray is starting to spiral, not knowing.
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Later that day, Winston and Ray are coming back from a call. Ghost captured. It was a semi harmless mist. Just a classic haunting, a cold-spot-in-the-hallway-that-fills-people-with-existential-dread. They get those a lot. They vacuumed it right up with a handy little device Egon and Ray developed for vaporous and semi liquid apparitions. It was an easy 500 bucks, a pleased client and no damage to the home. They should be driving home happy but Ray's normally sunshiney face is a thundercloud.

"Man, did you get some of that dread mist on you? You look terrible Ray," Winston is wondering if he should have let Ray drive. Now that the job adrenaline is done, he's got the blues big time. "Do you need some PKE decontamination electrolytes? A cheeseburger? What's going on there, Ray?"