I can do it with a broken heart (Lando Norris)

Chapter Eleven

The three chaotic weeks that followed were a complete contrast to the break in Monaco. Two days in she felt like Monaco was a lifetime ago and the stress of the tour and all its pressures had taken over again.

Cassie had been putting on the pressure about the new album, which she assumed meant the label were putting pressure on Cassie. She didn't know how to put in to words how completely overwhelming she was finding it just trying to make it to the end of a show each night, never mind trying to come up with something they might like the sound of.

This was the source of the problem though, she'd got all kinds of ideas floating around in her head. If they'd let her just write what she was feeling they'd probably have enough for a double album at this point. But they didn't want to hear about her break up, or the struggle to keep the show on the road while she tried to get her head straight.

To make matters worse, she'd made the fatal error of looking online in an attempt to find the article she'd done the interview for in Monaco and see what they'd said. She couldn't remember who had interviewed her to search specifically and the broad search she'd put into Google had brought up all the things she'd been so carefully avoiding for months. She could see why Cassie had been so keen for her to stay off the internet.

There were pages upon pages of articles dissecting every last detail of her life. People claiming they knew the reason behind her breakup with Joe, claims she was on drugs and that was what had happened when she'd had her breakdown on stage, articles discussing her weight and whether she might be pregnant. Speculating that was why Joe had left her. Articles discussing her relationship with Lando, referring to him as her next victim. Suggestions she'd been cheating on Joe with Lando for months. Photos taken of the two of them having dinner in Monaco- the overwhelming verdict of the internet that he deserved someone far better. That part she was perhaps inclined to agree with.

She should've stopped reading as soon as she saw the headlines, but something about it drew her in. She'd sat there and cried as she'd read every last word and comment. Hundreds of total strangers on the internet tearing her life to shreds and going as far as to say they wished she was dead.

She'd read all that and then had to get up on stage and perform, knowing full well she'd be getting slated for it online later, no matter what she did. She'd sat in the makeup chair, staring at her reflection in the mirror critically, as though those articles she'd read had just highlighted every last flaw with a magnifying glass.

Her phone had sat on the table in front of her, Lando calling her to wish her luck, something he had taken to doing before every show. She didn't answer it, instead just watching until it rang out and went to voicemail.

She'd slowly slipped back into her old habit without even really noticing she'd done it. Quietly pulling away from Lando before she could let herself get any more attached. She fell back into the cycle of perform, drink until she could sleep and repeat.

She'd been blindly making her way through the tour dates, getting on flight after flight with no real idea where she was going, so much so that it took her a minute when they landed in LA to remember why they were there. Her heart sank as she realised the three weeks had passed in the blink of an eye and they were in LA for the premier.

She was even more confused to find Lando stood there waiting for her when she walked into her hotel room. Her eyes searched his face trying to read his expression. She'd barely spoken to him the last couple of weeks, and not through a lack of trying on his part, it had never occurred to her that he might still turn up. He'd never said he wouldn't, but why would he?