Good grammar, spaces between paragraphs, characters not being ruined, not word-for-word HP with slight changes, and most importantly, slow burn. Not to toot my own horn, but I'd say all of that is something I look for in a fanfic.
Elisabeth- or Lisa...
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Lisa was scribbling notes on parchment paper when she got hit in the face with a crumbled up piece of paper.
She looked up with a scowl to see Adrian Pucey, another Slytherin two years older than her. He smirked and gestured at the paper. After opening it and reading its contents, Lisa internally screamed.
It said, "Do you want to go to the Ball with me?" with two little boxes labeled yes and no.
It was still too early in her eyes to accept anyone she wasn't 100% sure about. He was really attractive though. She thought for a second, then wrote back a, "Can I get back to you?"
She waited for Professor McGonagall to turn her back before tossing it back at him.
She watched him read it, look up, and give her a thumbs up. It was nice to have options, but who was she waiting for?
After class she was walking by her friends when she noticed someone was staring right at her. It was Harry. So weird, she thought, and raised an eyebrow at him.
He started walking up to her, when he was intercepted by her father.
"Lisa," Severus called. "You left your homework on your table. You must have been rushing to leave..." He glanced sharply over his back but Harry was talking to his friends now, pretending like he wasn't walking over. Lisa smirked shortly until Severus turned back around.
"I'm not in a rush, Dad," Lisa said in an exasperated tone.
He tutted. "I believe so. Perhaps you need to rush finding a date to the ball." He sighed and lowered his tone so her friends wouldn't hear. "Don't stress, Elisabeth. You have your mother's looks. There won't be any need to worry. My only worry is who will be taking you." His eyes flashed dangerously.
"I've gotten some requests," Lisa admitted. "Pucey asked last class!"
His permanent frown deepened. "Pucey is an idiot. He's from a good family, but Quidditch isn't everything." Lisa's heart ached at the mention of her sport.
She listed the names of the other suitors and he shook his head dismissively. "Never heard of them. They're not good enough."
"If there was anyone in this school you wanted me to go with, who would it be?" Lisa asked curiously.
Severus thought for a moment. "I can't say I haven't thought about it. It's certainly hard to find someone decent in this school. Maybe Montague. Or Zabini- as friends."
Lisa nodded in agreement. She knew deep down Severus wished she was with Draco, because he wanted them together since they were young. However, he and Daphne are made for each other and they always have been. Besides, even without Daphne, Lisa only saw Draco as a brother.
