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The Mafia's Purple Princess (Preface)

Hi! This is the first chapter that we have edited. This is an example of our editing skill. 

Edited by: Lilac and Jasmine

Before:

Preface(6 yers old)

I tapping my toes lightly as I made way through the silence eerines of the empty hallways. the once familiar sound of my daddies voice that used to with be me in these spaces was now absent, leaving a hole heart in my heart. His sickness has worsed... Gazing out of the nearby window, my eyes landed on the rose's blooming in the garden, they're radiant red petals glistenieng under the moonlight, a stark contrast to the darkness that rapped the night. As, I stood by my daddies motionless body, my eyes caught sight of a young boy nearby standing. He was tall and blackette haired, a contrast to the sene of tragedy that unfolded before us. In his hand, a glimmering nife shimmering, sending a shiver down my spine.

My voice caught in my throat as I let out a piercing scream. i gave a futile attempt to stop the horror that was about to unfold. Despite my desperate cry of "NO!" it was already too late. My worst fears materialized as I watched helplessly while the life drained from my dads body a chilling stillness settling in the room. The young boy remained his stance unwavering as he turned his attention towards me, his gaze piercing and unsettling. qith a steady hand, he raised the knife, the metal blade catching the dim light, a silent threat looming in the air.

Fear gripped me. paralyzing my movements as I stared back at the ominous figure before me, When I had gotten the courage to look up after a moment of dread-filled silence. the boy had vanished into the shadows. Leaving me alone with the haunting memory of the tragedy that had just unfolded before my eyes.

After:

Preface(6 years old)

I was tapping my feet lightly as I made my way through the silent eeriness of the empty hallways. The once familiar sound of my father's voice that used to be with me in these dark spaces was now absent, leaving a hole in my heart.

His sickness has worsened...

Gazing out of the nearby window, my eyes landed on the roses blooming in the garden, their radiant red petals glistening under the moonlight, a stark contrast to the darkness that wrapped the night. As I stood by my father's sleeping body, my eyes caught sight of a young boy nearby standing. He was tall and had jet-black hair, a contrast to the scene of tragedy that unfolded before us. In his hand, I caught sight of a metal knife glistening in the moonlight, sending a shiver down my spine.

My voice caught in my throat as I let out a piercing scream. I gave a futile attempt to stop the horror that was about to unfold.

"NO!" I screamed as I realized what was about to happen.

Despite my desperate cry, it was already too late.

My worst fears materialized as I watched helplessly while life drained from my father's body, a chilling stillness settling in the room. The young boy remained in his stance, unwavering as he turned his attention towards me, his gaze piercing and unsettling. With a steady hand, the boy raised the knife, the metal blade catching the dim light, a silent threat looming in the air.

Fear gripped me, paralyzing my movements as I stared back at the ominous figure before me. When I had gotten the courage to look up after a moment of dread-filled silence, the boy had vanished into the shadows, leaving me alone with the haunting memory of the tragedy that had just unfolded before my eyes.