Until I Found You

4. Support System

After dinner, Priya tucked Pihu into bed.

Once her daughter drifted off to sleep, she went to the kitchen to prepare two cups of her and Ram's favourite chamomile tea, and then headed to his room.

She knocked on his door once.

No response.

She knocked again.

No response again.

She frowned at the closed door. She knew he was awake, the light seeping from under the door was proof.

"Akdu!" she muttered under her breath, getting a little frustrated upon being ignored again and again.

She kept frowning at the door for a good while, and then took in a deep breath. Now was not the time to get irritated. She was in the wrong here, and it was on her to make things alright between them right now.

"Ram mere haath mein chai hai. Please open?" she softly pleaded, knocking once more.

Thankfully, he opened the door this time around.

"Sorry," she immediately apologised, something within her twisting seeing his dull face.

Ram wordlessly turned around, settling in front of his laptop on the bed.

Priya scanned him for a second and then entered the room, placing the tray with the mugs on the side table before taking a seat opposite him.

"Sorry, Ram. Mujhe woh sab nahi kehna chahiye tha. I crossed a line, and I know that."

She took a pause to gauge his reaction, but could not make anything of his expressions.

So she continued, "Main naa hi Kriti ko jaanti hoon, naa hi tumhare relation ko samajhti hoon. I should not have-"

"Tum sahi thi."

"Huh?"

"You were right," he blew thick air out of his mouth, closing his laptop and pushing it aside, "aur shayad iss hi liye mujhe gussa aaya."

Priya looked at him blankly, trying to process what he had just said. It was unexpected, especially after their tense exchange earlier.

Ram's voice was low and filled with sadness as he went on to explain, "Shayad kahin naa kahin main yeh baat jaanta tha. Ki I never loved Kriti. Par accept karne se darr tha tha. Iss sachayi se bhaagte rehta tha. Tumne itne saaf shabdon mein jab woh sab mujhse kaha...tab..." he trailed off, not knowing how to put into words what had happened to him.

He breathed out heavily, running his fingers through his hair, "Tab...it all came to the surface."

Priya looked at him sadly, understanding his reaction even better now.

"I didn't mean to upset you," she said softly, guilt evident in her voice, "Sorr-"

Ram shook his head as a wry smile formed on his lips.

"Nahi, tum toh sahi hi keh rhi thi. Main hi tha...I-I had been avoiding it for too long..."

There was a moment of silence between them as they tried to make sense of the complexity of emotions being talked about here.

"I'm sorry...tumse uss tone mein baat karne ke liye. Mujhe awaaz nahi uthaani chahiye thi," he further admitted while fidgeting with his fingers, feeling disappointed in himself, "Mujhe nahi pata maine kyun waise react kiya...kya wajah thi...meri insecurities...mere regrets...ya phir meri sharam...I...uh..."

"Insecurities? Sharam?" Priya's brow furrowed in confusion.

But she decided to not inquire. If he wanted to, she knew he would elaborate without her having to ask anything.