His, Only His

1. Gone

1

I couldn't believe it. I watched, helpless, and I shouted his name, telling him to duck. I shouted and shouted, tears forming in my eyes, my heart already shattering before the trigger was even pulled.

His eyes even seemed to glance at me behind those spectacles that always had me wishing they weren't in the way. It was the one piece of his outfit that I could always take away from him. The one piece that gave me a sense of reality. Hell yes, my boyfriend and I are undercover spies who have fancy glasses given to us by a man called Merlin.

At that moment, the trigger pulled and I watched him mouth the words, "I'm sorry," as he looked straight into the camera. And the bullet collided with his head.

My knees weakened and my legs gave out, my body falling to the floor. All I could see, replaying in my head, was the bullet connecting, blood splattering everywhere, and his body falling to the ground with a mundane finality.

My hand covered my mouth as my vision grew blurry. It became harder and harder to contain my sobs and cries of distress. I felt like a child who was dropped off at day camp, hearing their mother say "goodbye," and not wanting her to leave.

All I knew was that I was still shaking, the little droplets of water falling from my eyes staining my cheeks, and my mouth still covered by my hand. I was joking myself that my hand would cover the sounds of my cries.

I was half expecting him to whisper something in my ear, tell me he was alright. But nothing. There was nothing but static. It's not every day you watch your boyfriend get brutally murdered. Of course, you would hope he would be alive as well.

My tears stopped, as did the sobbing, and I soon became too numb to feel anything. When Merlin called me, I clambered on to my feet and delicately held the phone in my grasp.

"Guinevere, Guinevere are you there?" Merlin's voice was soft, disbelieving.

I dry-swallowed, and replied, my voice hoarse, "Yes, I'm here."

"Guinevere- I-I..." We were both trying hard not to point out the elephant of the conversation.

"Don't you fucking dare say that you're sorry," I scolded into the phone. "You loved him just as much as I did. I-I...." I sighed, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. "Merlin, I need you. I need you right now.... God dammit."

Merlin sighed through the phone. "Eggsy," was all he said and my eyes widened.

"I'll be at HQ in ten minutes," I muttered and ended the call, shoving the phone in my pocket, grabbing my jacket and racing out the door. My car was waiting for me, already ready to drive. I sped away, toward's Harry's house.

I reached the house and parked, turning off the ignition and pulling out my keys. I sighed before rushing into the house and flinging the door open, finding Eggsy at the bottom of the stairs, a bit startled.

I recognized his pained face and I walked over to him, wrapping my arms around him and giving him a tight hug. He immediately hugged me back.

"HQ," I mumbled into the younger boy's chest and he nodded in understanding. The hug broke and we both got in my car, driving to the tailor's shop and quickly heading downstairs. We made it to HQ just when I said we would and Merlin was waiting for me just where I knew he would be.

He stood, and I stood, facing him, a good twenty feet away, before running into his arms. It wasn't a happy hug, it was a desperate need of consoling hug. All I wanted to do was cry and cry, but no tears came.

There was a mission to get done, and afterwords, we would all be able to have closure on today's events. But that long awaited moment would not be yet.

"Guinevere. You need to listen to me," Merlin said, pulling away from the hug. I nodded and looked at him with full attention.

"I'm sending Eggsy and Roxy out in the field. Your emotions are too out of control right now. You cannot go out there. Do you understand me?"

I nodded, telling him I heard every word he said. And though it tore me apart, I knew I couldn't go anywhere.

"Just do it. Give me some drug that will keep me asleep for as long as you need me to be." I looked at him with pleading eyes. "Please, Merlin."

He smiled slightly, trying to joke. "I knew you would ask something like that."

He pulled a syringe out of his pocket and held my arm tightly in his grasp before injecting the splashing purple liquid into my bloodstream.

The last thing I remembered was Eggsy picking me up and carrying me to the infirmary for safe keeping. Then the world went black.