Taejin - The Architect

Chapter 14: Someone Else Not Me

Several days had passed since the Geotechnical Engineer team started their work. And as an architect, Kim Taehyung had absolutely nothing to do in Goseong right now. Sometimes he would just sit in the shade and draw a new building design on his laptop, something completely unrelated to this Goseong Astronomy Museum project.

Despite that, everybody seemed to know and understand why he was still there up until today. After all, Taehyung never even tried to hide his feelings and his intentions toward Seokjin.

Taehyung himself didn't really care about what people thought and continued to linger around Seokjin at the construction site. Checking on him regularly, worrying whether Jin was fit enough to return to work in the field already.

Saturday had passed, and Taehyung's concern about his love rival—-who asked Seokjin out again—-had finally passed by. Seokjin was still stuck with work in Goseong, and Taehyung could smile in relief for now. One thing he regretted was that, immediately after recovering from the fever, Seokjin returned to his shared-bedroom with Jimin, a few rooms away from his own.

For the time being, Taehyung didn't actually make any significant progress with Seokjin. Seokjin was still hard to read and approach. He often initiated a bicker with Taehyung out of the blue. His eyes always glared and his brows often furrowed every time he looked at Taehyung. He really didn't go easy on Taehyung at all. Sometimes, Taehyung didn't even understand what he did wrong to make Seokjin frown whenever he saw him. Was his existence alone offended Seokjin that much?

"We've finished collecting all the rock and soil samples, Hyung." Jimin approached them in the shade with clothes covered in dirt and sweat dripping down his face and neck. His finger pointed at the drilling operations on the site, not too far from where Seokjin sat.

"I think we can wrap up soon and send all the samples to the lab." Jimin added. "Overall, it seems like there's nothing to worry about. The land is stable and level, no soil settlement or slope instability. The rock, clay, and water content are still at reasonable limits, but we'll be waiting for the lab results later to be more certain."

"Good." These would make the foundation drilling and the building construction easier. "Thanks, Chim." Seokjin nodded at him.

"That's a relief," Taehyung commented after Jimin left.

Seokjin side-eyed him. "Actually, it would be more fun to build a spherical building on a slope, you know..." A sarcastic remark. "Then watching it roll down the hill like a ball..."

Taehyung laughed. "You managed to make my vision a reality somehow, Big Brain!" Taehyung praised. In return, he heard the younger one sigh in annoyance, but he didn't bother. "I wanna take you to the beach. I promised you that, remember?"

Seokjin didn't respond.

"How about at sunset time today?"

Sunset... Seokjin glanced at Taehyung, then lowered his gaze to his laptop. "Are you trying to romance me?"

"Yep. I've asked you to give me a chance, have I?"

Seokjin was back in silence.

"Did he romance you better than I do?" A prick of ugly jealousy stabbed Taehyung's heart.

"Who?"

"The other man who took you on a hiking date."

Seokjin suddenly burst into laughter. The hiking date! The memory of that hike alone already tickled Seokjin's funny bone.

"What? Why? What is it? Why are you laughing?" The older one didn't understand.

"... Nothing..." Seokjin tried to compose himself and forget that disastrous date.

"Are you going to go on another date with him?" Another somber question from the gloomy man beside him.

Seokjin looked at Taehyung deeply for seconds, then averted his gaze away. "Why are you still asking if the answer will only hurt you?"

Taehyung sighed. "I can't help it..." He laid down on the grass and rubbed his face, looking so miserable. His eyes stung, so he covered them with his palms. The pain of loving Jin was now deeper. His love was unrequited, but he was willing to endure the agony and the relentless ache if it meant holding onto the possibility of his love being reciprocated one day.

Seokjin exhaled sharply. "I wanna be certain of my own feelings before I decide to settle down with anyone."

Taehyung didn't respond. He knew that. He wouldn't force him. "Tell me, where's my current position, Jin?"

Seokjin went quiet for a few moments. "From your story, I feel like you're tremendously attached to your past lover. When you talked about him with so much love and affection, for me, you talked about a stranger. Someone I don't know. Someone else, that's not me. You love him, not me. And it scares me. It scares me that you only pursue me to relive your past with him." Seokjin paused.

"I don't have his memory. I don't feel what he used to feel about you, Taehyung shi. I might not have his personality as well." He continued, while Taehyung was still listening in silence. "If you keep seeing me as your past lover, I'm afraid you might be disappointed. If you want to try it with me, you have to see me as me alone."

Ah, Taehyung understood now why Seokjin always looked annoyed when he saw him. So that was the reason! Instead of feeling adored and loved, Seokjin actually felt that Taehyung was in love with someone else who was not him.

Taehyung let out a long breath. There was a truth in Seokjin's words that Taehyung reluctantly acknowledged. "I see.... I understand...." He swallowed it hard.

They didn't go to see the sunset at the beach that day. And Taehyung spent the rest of their short day with very few words. He had to retreat for now. Giving both of them space and some time apart. He knew how stubborn the younger one was. Pushing further would only chase Seokjin away. If Taehyung wanted to win him, he had to play by Jin's rules.

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All the team went back to Seoul the next day and Taehyung drove Jin back that Monday afternoon.

"You've been awfully quiet since our last conversation yesterday," Seokjin pointed out the elephant in the room as they were on their way.

"I've been thinking about all your words. Trying to put myself in your shoes." Taehyung's eyes were straight on the road ahead. "You're right. I see my past lover in you, not exactly you as you. I take you two as the same person. I know how awful that sounds to you.... I'm sorry..." Taehyung cleared his throat.

"I need time to sort out my feelings and rethink everything." He continued. "I'm sorry for burdening you with all the stories of my past."

Seokjin listened without uttering a single word. He didn't know how to respond. He also didn't know what Taehyung would actually do next. So, when they finally arrived at Seokjin's apartment complex, they just left everything hanging as it was and bid goodbye just like that.

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