COWGIRL ✸ Twisters

Thirteen ╱ Stay

        The next morning came so quickly. It feels like just a few minutes ago I was in Lilly's car with a dirtied, rain-coated Tyler. Or, maybe, I just feel that way because he's standing in front of me. 

He's loading his truck with his luggage as if he's going to leave and a million-and-one questions pass through my brain all at once. 

"Mornin'." I say, not able to swallow down the feeling of my stomach churning as I throw a hand over my eyes, shielding my sight from the peering sun and letting me focus on only Tyler. 

He looks back at me, and he stops situating his bags in the back of his truck to face me, prompting me to take a step back. He smiles -- smirks -- and places his hands on his hips when he squints down at me. "I don't remember the last time you actually greeted me, Texas." 

I roll my eyes, and thanks to the way Tyler towers over me in height, he's now guarding me from the sun, so I'm able to drop my hand and look at only him. "You leavin'?" 

I hate how my voice sounds so sad when I say it. So quiet and almost shaky. 

"I'm goin' to find Kate." 

Kate. Right. 

"Oh." There's a small furrowing of my brows as I hear the words. I can feel it. "Okay."

I watch an indent of Tyler's own form between his eyebrows, like he's trying to figure out why I just reacted the way I did. Shit. "What?"

I shake my head quickly, confused at my own emotions. "Nothin'." 

We look at each other for longer than I'd like. Me, with longing I didn't even know was in me. And him, analyzing me. 

I swallow, drawing my gaze from his intense green eyes and draw in a sharp breath, wiping my now sweaty palms against the denim on my thighs. "Well, there's nothin' for me here so I better get goin' too." 

His face morphs into something irrecognizable -- the look behind his eyes flickering with a mix of saddened emotions. He says for the second time. "What?"

I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, suddenly annoyed with the way the wind grazed it against my cheek. "What? I can't afford to keep stayin' here when there's nothin' for me."

Ask me to stay. Is what I don't say. 

But instead, he just works his jaw back and forth, no longer looking at me either. 

"So I guess this is goodbye." I say, sucking my bottom lip between my top row of teeth. 

Tell me to stay. 

It's deja vu. Like Little Rock six months ago. 

I close my lips together for a final time, watching him stare at the shoes on his feet. "Goodbye, Tyler." 

Beg me to stay. 

I walk away from him, still holding my breath and trying to shake the feeling eating away at me as I jam my hands in my pockets. 

Please.

"Dallas."

I turn my head only, hoping it wasn't so fast I seem desperate for him to say the words.

First, he offers me the smallest, most genuine of smiles. Then, he says a different set of words that brings back my heartbeat. "I'll be back." 

I nod, hoping my eyes don't tell him too much. 

And he tips his Stetson to me, his smirk telling me that he's looking for a rise out of me. 

I roll my eyes for what I hope won't be the final time, fighting off another smile. "See you later, Tyler." 

"Don't miss me too much, Cowgirl." 

And I walk back up the rusty black staircase to my room, not looking back until I'm in the room, and when I am, I open the curtains ever so slightly to watch as he pulls out the parking lot. Just like I used to every morning when he'd leave for work. 

But still, even now, he knows my habit. He waves up at me, and I quickly hide myself in the blue curtains. 

And the same stupid smile sticks to my face every now and then that night -- each time I think about Tyler. Our future. What it could hold. 

He'll be back. I remind myself. 

And so I wait by the door like a dog, looking out the window every couple of hours, until finally, the moon is gone and the sun smiles back at me.