Reconsidering My Place(Completed)

Discomfort

Anakin POV

We departed the Venator and made our way through hyperspace, we'll arrive within 10 minutes. I was upfront with Aayla, Barriss and Rex. The latter two were flying the Twilight. Upon further discussion, we decided against taking a squad of troopers. We were enough. "Aayla, we're 10 minutes out," I informed, standing before her. "I see. Try not to get seriously injured, Anakin." She joked.

I cocked a half smile. "That was one time." She shared her own smile before her features contorted into a grimace. She looked down and away, her arms hugging herself.

"Is it that again?" I asked knowingly, placing my hand on her shoulder. She flinched at my touch. "I'm sorry. Yes. It is. My back this time." She whispered. We were far enough for the two pilots to not hear, especially since they were engaged in conversion.

"Come."

I guided her to the medical bay and had her sit on the table. I deactivated the droid before closing the door. This is best not attended to by a droid. "How much does it hurt?" I queried softly. "7/10. Burning." She answered. I knew exactly the remedy.

You see, Aayla suffered from phantom pain from her time as a slave. Every once in a while, when she is relaxed, she is stricken with pain in an area where she was abused. It's not a pretty thing and I hate to see her like that. So recently, as a favour, I began learning massage techniques. In return, she helps with my amputation therapy. She has a special way of manipulating the nerves in my body and soothing the phantom pain.

"You know the drill," I spoke. She pouted. "Anakin, you don't have to. We're on the clock." She said with embarrassment. "I know. But I want to. Now take your top off and go lay down while I look for the bacta." I demanded, walking towards the cabinet to find the bacta.

It was right in front of me but I decided to give her a little bit more time to get situated. We have a strong friendship and respect each other's boundaries so I make sure not to let my eyes wander. As intimate as it is, we both understand that we're just two broken souls trying to help each other and there isn't a drop of lust or attraction between us. She's my sister if anything and I, her little brother. Nera.

I grabbed the bacta and a rag and soaked the rag in said bacta.

"Ready?" I asked. "Be quick."

Barriss POV

"I'll go inform the Masters," I informed the Commander. He nodded and wordlessly assumed full control of the Twilight.

We were 2 minutes away from the target world. Time to look for those two. I've noticed how close they are. Through many inquiries, Anakin his past and how he related to her. They're attachments. I'm envious. She's had more time and experience with him, two things I want. I need. If I have any hope of freeing him from Senator Amidala, I must get closer to him.

The other day, he came home with a red cheek. He has used cheap makeup to mask it. That night I wrapped myself around his back as we slept. I occasionally sleep in his room.

At this point, we are more than Master and student. Something akin to friends, but we take care of each other. He still helps with my nightmares and darker thoughts. If it weren't for him I may have fallen. The Force knows I would.

I've been teaching myself to allow attachments. Anakin sets me at peace. And I, in return, make him happy.

Scans indicated he was in the med bay. I hope none of them are sick. I made my way over and opened the door. "Barriss... Okay, I know this looks weird..." I couldn't hear anything Anakin said. Well, I just didn't care for it. Master Secura was on the examination table, shirtless, with Anakin standing over her with his hands on her shoulder blades. A massage. I never got a mass from him before. "We arrive in a minute." I monotoned.

Anakin worriedly nodded, and Master Secura refused to speak. "When we get home, I'm next." I blurted. Why did I just say that? No no no now they think I'm weird.

An hour later

The four of us made the planet fall undetected. We parked the Twilight outside their scan range and we quickly traversed the dense forest that preceded the flat lands upon which the Outpost. We're not sure what it's used for, that's why the ARC Troopers were sent.

Anakin and Rex ran slightly ahead, acting as forward Recon. This left Aayla and I in the back. "Barriss." She breathed quietly. "Master?" I acknowledged. She didn't look at me at all. "I hope you don't see me any different after what you saw." Stated the Twi'lek, embarrassment present in her accented voice. "Not at all. Anakin was just helping you and that's fine. Plus I see you as lucky." I chuckled. I hope all this talking doesn't affect my stamina.

"Lucky?" She repeated. "Yes. What I'd give to be touched that like that by him." I let slip. Aayla stared at me with an awkward expression, raised eyebrow and ajar mouth. I quickly attempted to fix my words, "What I mean is... To be massaged by him."

She didn't seem to take my words at face value, her eyes searched for understanding. "Perhaps I've misjudged you, Barriss. Here I thought you had no such desires." She hummed. "Am I not sentient, Master?"

She chuckled softly. "The question is, am I referring to desires of a sentient, or desires of a woman."

A woman? What could that possibly mean? What does this have to do with being massaged...touched by a man? Let's break it down as Master taught me.

Man. Touch. Woman.

Immediately heat rose to my cheeks and I felt Master Secura's stare pierce me. "After this mission, we'll have a talk, woman to woman." She reassured. I never thought of myself as a woman due to my age and experience compared to Master Unduli.

Perhaps I am a woman now.

Words 1021

Posted 7/9/2024