CARDAN AND JUDE

12. ACCEPTANCE

[Jude's Pov]

"Jude, do you need something?" Cardan asks me as I sit upright on the bed, my back against the headboard. My abdomen aches a little , but I shake my head, trying to ignore the pain.

"Just tired." I mumble.

He looks disheveled, his eyes puffy and red, and his hair a tangled mess. I can tell he's been crying, but his voice is steady as he waits for my response.

"Do you need something?" I repeat his question to him.

"It is you who needs healing, not me." He tilts his head in my direction and gives me a small, sad smile. This smile doesn't reach his eyes, and it is just to convince me that he is doing fine.

I can see right through his facade, knowing that he's struggling more than he lets on. Despite his attempt to appear strong, I can sense the vulnerability hidden beneath the surface.

But why?

I look around and find myself in a loose silk robe, which is strange considering that I remember wearing a beautiful dress Cardan gave me. A bottle of a concoction is placed on one table and herbs on the other. My eyes appear swollen from crying, and I realize that I must have been in distress. As I try to piece together what happened, a wave of confusion washes over me.

"What happened?" I ask, my voice hoarse and shaky. I struggle to remember the events leading up to this moment, feeling a sense of unease and fear creeping in.

"Don't you know?" Cardan hands me a glass of water and I trace the rim of the glass with the pad of my finger, trying to remember.

Cardan's expression is unreadable as he watches me, his eyes searching mine for any sign of recognition. I take a sip of the water, hoping it will jog my memory, but all I can recall is a feeling of overwhelming panic and despair.

I remember chatting with Vivi and Taryn , but the details are fuzzy and fragmented. The room feels suffocating, as if the answers are just out of reach. I remember blood on my hands, but I can't piece together how it got there.

"Did something happen to me? Are the babies safe?" I ask again, my hand traveling to my bump, which is slightly smoothened. I place the glass on the bedside table and glance over Cardan , who is sitting in a chair beside the bed, his expression unreadable.

"Why aren't you answering me?" I plead, feeling a surge of panic rising within me.

Cardan's eyes flicker with a mix of emotions before he finally speaks, "You need to rest first. I will explain everything to you later, when you're ready." He says, reaching for my hand, but I pull away, needing answers now more than ever.

"Please, Cardan, tell me what's going on," I implore, desperation creeping into my voice.

"Sweetheart, you will not like it." Cardan's voice is soft, almost pained, as he looks at me with a mixture of sorrow and concern. I can tell there's something serious going on, something that he's struggling to tell me.

Did I lost the babies?

Why I can't remember anything?

My eyes go to the bottle of concoction and recognize it. It is used to make someone get into a dreamless sleep, and when someone wakes up, it is usual to lose memories for a while.

"Whether I like it or not , I need to know what happened. Please tell me." I brace myself for the truth, knowing it will be difficult to hear.

Cardan opens my clenched palm and threads his fingers through mine, his touch grounding me.