Never Leave: The Complete Edition

"Hermione?"

Sniffling.

"Hermioneeee."

More sniffling.

"I'm smelling your underwear right now."

A weak sob and more sniffling.

"Now I think I'm going to wear it and go outside for a bit of a stroll. Nice and brisk outside, don't you think?"

A small cry and more sniffling.

"I suppose you might want to burn these panties afterwards, though. Just knowing that your lady parts rub against these on a basis does things to me that I'm not very proud of."

More. Goddamned. Sniffling.

Harry sighed. Well, he tried. He approached the bed and ripped the covers back. Hermione was knocked out of her daze as Harry picked her up and hefted her over his shoulder with ease.

"Harry?" She sniffed. Again.

"What?" He sounded more than a bit agitated.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm kicking you out."

"W-what?"

"If I have to repeat myself I will literally kick you out," He growled.

"W-why are you kicking me out?" She asked, more confused than anything.

"You're useless, that's why."

"What are you t-talking about?"

"Since Ron left, you've been doing nothing but cry. How exactly does that help me find a way to get rid of Horcruxes? How does that help me find them? How does that help me in any way whatsoever, Hermione? Not one bloody bit. So you're out."

"But Harry…you need me – "

"No, I need Hermione. Not this crying, useless, dependent, little girl. This is Ron's Hermione. The Hermione Ron made you become. I want my Hermione."

By then, Harry had put her back to her feet outside the tent, where she promptly fell over. "What do you mean?"

"My Hermione would have figured it out by now."

"Just give me a bit more time – "

"I gave you enough. Now leave. Go join your boyfriend while I do what I've been trying to do this whole time; leave without you two."

"I'm not letting you go on your own!" She yelled, and almost as an afterthought, she added, "and he's not my boyfriend."

Harry gave an unconcerned shrug. "Should be. You two are just like each other. Bloody useless when I need you the most. Ready to disappear at the drop of a hat."

"Harry! You know that's not true! I've always stood by you!"

"My Hermione stood by me," he corrected. "My Hermione was my best friend. I don't know what happened to her. I don't know who you are. Until My Hermione decides to come back, This Hermione needs to go. So get out."

"But Harry – "

"Get. Out."

He turned around and walked away. Hermione struggled to her feet, straining from misuse. "Harry, please… you can't do this alone."

"Maybe not. But I can't do this with you, either."

"Please, Harry. Give me another chance – "