/!\if anyone know Anything about this please let me know In comments, it would be extremely helpful, all my information is sourced from Google or online websites
I used to feel like things weren't reel for an hour or two or when I was tired, then I started feeling really zoned out and sad and stuck on the same thoughts for a week or so, but it would stop. Since the October holidays (about 1 month ago) I can't stop feeling like in not here, lies I'm a spectator of my own life, like I have no control and I don't want to do anything and I a
Can't do anything. I obviously started googling it and it said I was feeling depersonalization caused by trauma or stress (it's probably stress) and I'm really trying to get out of it, i don't know at what point it goes from a feeling to a disorder, but I also read that it can be a side problem of bigger disorders like anxiety, ocd or depression. Which obviously made me really worried. I hadn't said anything to my parents, and I'm probably not going to, I don't think they would do anything. I've been doing small things like journalism breathing exercises and trying to accept my emotions, but I'm not sur if it's working, it somehow feels liem it's getting worse,I doeht even realise when I'm talking anymore, I could be talking to someone and realise halfway through a word tag I am actually speaking with another human. I hate it.
I argued with my mom earlier, and I've thought about killing myself before, I decided I wouldn't do it, at least not without writing a letter . But after the argument ibtoo, a kitchen knife and cut my wrist, I didn't want anything to happend, I find it measuring to know that I can and that j can stop it all.
I don't remember what it feels like yo not fee, like this anymore, it's like I want it so much but I digt kneo what it is.
Sorry for bad writing, I will fix tomorrow
