Looking back at that phone.. The one that has the messages from people at school, the people whom claimed the were you're pride and glory, you're friends..
You think of how they can do such a miserable thing, call you worthless.. Tell you're stupid.. Lie to about caring.. Talked behind you're back, made cruel jokes about you sit there ..
Fresh arms, fresh thighs.
No scars, no lies.
You're happy, you're not dying.
You lay back on you're bed, holding back the tears, reading all the hateful things that wait beyond you're phone over and over in you're mind.
You're phone buzzes again.. It's the person you liked for months.
You wonder why they decided to message you .. You look at the message, reading every detail slowly, " Hey, Uhm.. Idk how to put this, I heard what's been going on, I'm not gonna judge you, I think you're worth It, if I have to I'll stand up and fight with you, ttyl, bye "
Tears roll down you're face..
You're smiling.. Finally someone cares.
.. The NEXT day ..
You're walking in the hallway, you get pinned by the people who are hurting you, the guy you like comes out saying " Hurt her you'll be regretting it "starring back at him he's angry at what they've done.. Angry about everything, the people who were hurting you walked away glimsing at you. You're scared that they'll do it again when he isn't there .
He walks with you, holding you're wrist, you're trying to keep you're shirt sleeves down, he starts looking at you and tells you.. " I'm angry for what they've done to my brother, they pushed him into suicide and he took his own life three weeks after he got text messages everyday saying kill himself. " looking at him thinking why he's tellin me this, does he know? Does he know what's going on with me? He moves his hand away from my wrist and I immidetialy jerk my sleeve down and he stares at me, my eyes are tearing up, but the numbness in my body, the control I've learned into every cut I made, the burning, the instant falling alseep after choking myself, I've controlled my tears.. He just stares at me..
He sees the pain.. He .. Slowly pulls my sleeves up.. Takin his thumb and rubbing my cuts and my scars, " Ouch that burns .. " I said.. He leans down and kisses evey scar, every cut, he said " you're to worth it to think you're not.. Stop for me.. I'll never let you go because I care " I never felt the warmness of the tear run down my cheek, he wiped it off and kissed my cheek saying I'm beautiful and I shine like the moon, all the tears my eyes cried he's sorry for not being there to wipe the away.
It's been 2 years since then.. I'm happy as child.. He's not letting a blade kiss his skin, I'm not letting a knife kiss my throat, the bottles kiss my heart, I didn't.. I am kissing my husband for the first time, my husband, the one who's been with me since his brother died.. The one.. Who kissed my scars, kissed my neck, kiss my heart and left the mark. We have 1 beatiful daughter, Shaye, 17 months, and a baby on the way, it's a boy, Shayne, still in mommies tummy.. My daughter has smiled at me while touching my wrist, my husband smiles at me says to her " Mommy and daddy have been in a battle, we won and then we had you " she smiles and giggles, I am complete
-- this is a true story, but I wrote it, it's about my older sisters story Please don't take advantage of this --
