Laurmani v. Camren

A Short One Shot

August 29, 2015

Ashley was watching television in the living room when she fell asleep on the couch. When she woke up, she noticed that her friend, Madison, was holding her phone.

"Uh...why are you going through my phone?" Ashley asked Madison.

"The real question is - why do you have so many Laurmani pictures on your phone?" responded Madison.

Ashley shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. I just think they're cute."

"I can't ship them romantically," Madison admitted.

"Why?" Ashley inquired.

"Normani is....black," said Madison.

Ashley questioned, "What does that have to do with anything?"

Madison replied, "I can't ship a black person with a precious, white Latina. I can only ship Normani with that other black girl in the group. What is her name? ....Dinah!"

"Dinah is not black," Ashley corrected.

"Then, what is she?" asked Madison.

"She's Tongan."

"What the fuck is a Tongan? Is that some kind of African tribe?" Madison asked.

"Never mind. I can't deal with you today," said Ashley.

October 15, 2015

Ashley came home from her job at the mall. When she walked in, Madison was typing furiously on her laptop apparently upset about something.

"What's wrong, Madison?" Ashley inquired.

"Some guy had the nerve to like Lauren's picture on Instagram, so I'm sending him death threats," answered Madison as she continued to type away.

"That's why Lauren hates Camren shippers," stated Ashley.

"No," disagreed Madison. "Lauren hates Camren shippers because we reveal the truth. She doesn't care about the other shippers because you all are delusional."

"Whatever, Madison."

November 21, 2015

Ashley was on her laptop catching up on the latest Fifth Harmony interviews. One, in particular, stood out to her because Laurmani were being so cute. She called Madison over from the kitchen.

"Hey, come here!" Ashley commanded. "Look at how cute Lauren and Normani are. They're holding hands throughout this whole interview."

Madison walked over to view the YouTube video on Ashley's laptop and watched for a couple of minutes. "Those two have no chemistry," she commented. "But, look at Camren. They brushed shoulders. Camren is real!"

"You're so annoying. Normani and Lauren could be making out and you would still find something that proves Camren is real," Ashley exclaimed.

"Duh! Everything is a conspiracy to cover up Camren. Lauren doesn't look at any other girl the way she looks at Camila," Madison argued.

"Why would they try to cover up one lesbian relationship with another?" Ashley questioned.

Madison scolded her roommate, "You're dumb as fuck. I'm not talking to you anymore."

February 7, 2016

Madison and Ashley were both in the living room browsing the Internet when Ashley came across some big news.

"Madison! Did you hear that someone hacked into Fifth Harmony's iCloud accounts?" asked Ashley.

"I already beat you to it," Madison informed her. "I just found the website that has the leaked pictures."

"Oh, let me see!" Ashley beamed. She looked over Madison's shoulder as she clicked through the pictures. "Oh, my god! Normani has a picture of her and Lauren kissing."

"That's nothing. It looks like they were just playing around," Madison said.

Ashley called attention to another picture. "Oh, my god! Why does Lauren have naked pictures of Normani on her phone?"

Madison hypothesized, "Normani probably stole Lauren's phone to take pictures of herself. You know how self-centered she is. Oh, look! Camila and Lauren took a selfie. We finally have proof that Camren is real!"

May 13, 2016

In her boring class, Ashley was reading news on Fifth Harmony on her phone when she came across an interesting article. It was about Lauren's laptop being stolen. Wanting more details, she searched for more recent articles for any updates. Articles released just a couple of hours before revealed that there was a sex tape on Lauren's computer. So, Ashley did some more digging to see if the video had been posted online and it had. With the volume turned all the way down, she started playing the video on her phone. To her surprise, the video was of Normani and Lauren having sex.

Ashley couldn't wait to get home to show the video to Madison if she hadn't seen it already. Once class was let out, she ran straight out to her car and sped home. By the time she burst through the door, she was out of breath.

"Laurmani has a sex tape," Ashley huffed to her friend who was sitting in the living room.
Madison gasped, "I don't believe it."

Ashley sat down and pulled out her phone to show Madison the video which Madison studied closely. She appeared to be skeptical. "That's not Lauren. That's Megan Fox."

"The fuck? That ain't Megan Fox," Ashley exclaimed. "Can't you see Lauren's tattoos?"

"Those are obviously fake, and that's not Normani either. It's Serena Williams," added Madison.

"Bitch, that ain't Serena Williams. And, why would Megan Fox draw on fake tattoos pretending to be Lauren and make a sex tape with Serena Williams?" asked Ashley.

Madison snapped, "You're stupid. Leave me alone."

June 10, 2017

"Aw! Lauren and Normani are on the cover of People Magazine. Their wedding looked amazing," mentioned Ashley.

Madison shook her head. "The lengths they will go to in order to hide Camren's relationship. Now, I gotta get back to sending death threats to Shawn Mendes, Charlie Puth, Jacob Whitesides, Michael Clifford, and the 100 other white boys who have flirted with Camila."