Chapter XI.

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The Strength to Chase, to Change, to Love

It was 9:34 PM when they returned to Zane's mansion. Nick and Ryan continued as if nothing indecent had happened during their date. And honestly, Ryan was glad that Nick decided to keep things like this. It certainly kept the post-sex awkwardness at bay.

Ryan stretched as he got out of the limo, contemplating to simply flop onto his bed and sleep until he realized that he had forgotten to change out of his swimwear. He would also be needing a shower. Ryan remembered that there was a shower in his room.

"I'm heading for the shower," he said, turning to Nick. "I'll see you in the morning, Nick."

"You too, Ryan," Nick said, smiling.

When Ryan was out of sight, Nathan spoke up.

"Nick-"

"I'm going to use the shower, Nathan," Nick said, looking at his younger brother. "I'll meet you in the room later, okay?"

Nick rubbed the towel through his hair and threw his head back. His brunette locks sagged down a bit since they were wet. Nick shook his hair, put on the pajamas he had brought into the shower with him, hung his towel on the towel rack and exited the bathroom.

He had expected to see both Trent and Nathan there to confront him about his and Ryan's date, but thankfully there was only Nathan, who was sitting cross-legged on his bed.

"Are you going to tell me what really happened with Mckee?" his younger brother asked.

"Nope," Nick singsonged. The brunette grabbed Chester, held him to his chest, sat on the edge of his bed and lied down. "Besides," he continued, "you probably figured it out."

"Then how are you taking it so lightly!?" Nathan asked. "Nick!!"

A look came over his older brother's face that Nathan never saw before.

"I just wanted one day," Nick said. "One day to be with him. Whatever happened, I just wanted one day."

"Then he did-" have sex with you, Nathan going to say but Nick cut him off.

"Of course he did, Nathan." Nick shut his eyes and smiled a little. "He's Ryan Yorushi, after all."

"Nick!"

The older Keane didn't say anything for a moment. "It would have been nice if he wasn't so...pro... proms," Nick looked to his brother. "What's the nice word you use to describe him?"

"Promiscuous," Nathan answered.

"Promiscuous. It would have been nice if he wasn't so promiscuous. If he had fallen in love with me today and realized that he should have no one else but me, and he would wake up tomorrow and only think of me. That would have been nice. But Nathan..." Nick clutched Chester tightly, "...I don't have that kind of strength. I can't-I can't make Ryan Mckee fall in love with me like that. So I thought that if I could just spend one day with him, then it would be all right."

'But he would never fall in love with me,' Nick thought. 'Of course not.'

Nick heard Nathan climb onto his bed, and it was when he tried to see him did the brunette realize he was crying.

The younger Keane held a tissue out to him.

"Here," he said.

Nick smiled. He sat up, took the tissue and wiped his eyes, half-ashamed of his stupid tears. He had contemplated about this outcome for a long time. Why was he crying about it now?

"Nick, you're much more mature about sex then you've let on, aren't you?" Nathan asked.

"Heh," Nick nodded sheepishly. "Kinda."

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