3 days have passed since everything happened. Gideon is back to normal but still stays away from me at night not wanting to be around me, afraid he would hurt me again. Which sucks since I miss him terribly but I know I can't force him to be fully back to normal with me how things used to be.
Brandy's funeral was today and I wasn't ready for it. I don't think any of us were. Tony got me up early this morning since the morgue was bringing her remains back to us so we could do what we wished with them.
Callie wanted to spread her ashes in the Green House where I was growing my new roses so Gideon and I agreed to let her. Even though Gideon wouldn't let us in the Green house till the time came, which was odd but I didn't want to push the matter further afraid I would push him further away from me.
I left Callie still in bed since it was 6:30 when Tony got me up. I got up and went downstairs for my morning cigarette and coffee before taking my shower and get dressed for the day. Issy and everyone was in the kitchen having their coffee except for Gideon which didn't surprise me.
"He's up but he's in the Green House." Sylas said as he handed me my coco coffee.
"I figured he was." I said as I lit my first cigarette of the day.
"You shouldn't smoke it's bad for the baby." Issy said as I glared at her.
"I can't quiet cold turkey I'm down to 3 a day, I'm trying to ween myself from them get off my ass Issy." I said as she backed away from me afraid I would bite her head off.
"Is Callie still in bed?" Abelle asked as I nodded.
"Yep...I don't think I will wake her up till after my shower then I will get her ready." I said taking a sip of my coffee. Letting the warm substance comfort my chilled body.
We didn't talk much after that. As I finished my coffee I watched as Gideon came into the kitchen with no shirt on, only wearing his blue jeans and his boots. I had to tare my eyes and thoughts away from him. I had to leave the kitchen before I went over to him and kiss him, hug him, hold him to me. I fought every being in me to walk away from him.
"Well, I'm gone...I need to take a shower and get ready before they come." I said standing up from my seat and headed out of the kitchen feeling Gideon's eyes on me. It sent shivers down my spine even though I just had coffee that heated me up.
Once out of the kitchen I headed to our room to get some clothing to take a shower in my new room. I stilled myself as I felt his presence behind me. I didn't dare to look towards him afraid I would fall apart. All I could do was to continue to get my clothing for today and leave the room.
"You don't have to shower in another room I will leave." Gideon said as I turned to look at him.
"You shouldn't have to leave this is your room." I said avoiding his eyes on me.
"This is your room as well." Gideon said placing his hands on my shoulder to make me stop walking.
"I have a new room now...I can't stand sleeping alone." I said closing my eyes wanting to cry.
"Like I can? I kills me sleeping in here without you." Gideon said tipping my chin up to him making me look up at him.
"It's your decision...you act like you don't want me to be around you since....since everything happened....you act like you don't...." I said not daring to let the last 3 words escape from my mouth afraid I would completely break down in front of him.
"I act like I don't what...finish the sentence." Gideon said without a growl in his voice for one but I still shook my head. "Please." He begged looking into my eyes.
