groupchat // ed; gd; ac; jd

one

Cara's P.O.V

After getting ready and packing all my bags I sit on my bed and think about how far I've come.

***FLASHBACK***

After filming my first video I start to have doubts about whether I will really update it or not. I posted a cute summer makeup tutorial. I pase back and forth across my room and after about 20 mine minutes I finally give in. I take a deep breath and click 'upload'. I decide to go to bed and that way it will be ready by morning.

I wake up to the smell of pancakes coming from downstairs. I run down and find my mom cooking in the kitchen. Then suddenly I remember. The video. I quickly run upstairs to my room and look at my computer screen. It says the video was uploaded 1 hour ago. It hasn't got any views yet. I don't expect it to get many, I mean who would wanna watch me doing anything!? It was a stupid idea anyways. I shut my computer screen off and get ready and head to school.

When I arrive at school I notice people staring at me. It's nothing new. People always give me dirty looks and try to make me uncomfortable. I just ignore it and walk over to my two best friends, Lexi and Callie.

"Hey guys guess what!" I say as I walk over to them.

"What?" They both ask.

"I posted a YouTube video" I tell them but before they respond I hear footsteps walking towards me. I gulp knowing who it is without even having to turn around and look. Then I feel someone tug on my arm. I turn around already knowing who it was.

"So I hear you think your all internet famous now" Jill, my bully laughs. Her friend group laughs too.

Jill is the most popular girl in school. All the guys want her and all the girls want to be her friend. She's nice to everyone in the school.. Except for me. I have no idea why she hates me so much but all I know is that her goal in life is to ruin my life and she sure does a great job.

"What are you talking about?" I ask.

"I heard about your little YouTube video. You think your a star now?" She says. Before I can respond she pushes me down hitting my head off a locker and walks away.

"Are you okay?" Callie and Lexi both ask.

"Yeah I'm fine. Can I just be alone now?" They nod and walk away.

I run to the bathroom and cry. This happens everyday. Jill and her friends make my life a living nightmare. They call me name everyday and say I'm ugly and that my life is not worth living. Someone's they will even physically hurt me. I never wanted to tell my mom but one day after I came home with at black eye and bruises all over my body she kind of figured out that someone was after me. I told her that I got into a fight with a girl at my school but I didn't say who. All I told her is that she has nothing to worry about and it was just over something stupid. She always tries to talk about it but I don't want to worry her. And I don't like to bring up the subject.

After a horrible day at school I walk home. Soon as I get into my house I run upstairs and begin to cry. I look into the mirror and see the makeup running down my face. Your so ugly is all I can think. The words I hear everyday at school but I can't blame anyone for saying that because it's true. You're so ugly is all I can think. I run to my bathroom and grab my razor. I thought about doing this before but I've never actually went through with it but now I don't care. I hate putting up with Jill and her friends tormenting me everyday! I'm done. As I'm about to touch the blade to my skin I remember I have to delete the video! I just posted it for fun but Jill's right it's so stupid and I'm never gonna be pretty or popular like everyone else.

I run to my room and turn on my computer. I go to the YouTube app and sign into my account. I look at my profile and my jaw drops.

I HAVE TEN THOUSAND VIEWS ON MY VIDEO!!!! I have 560 likes and 11 dislikes. I fill up with excitement until I see my top comment. I explode with excitement and start to cry! Tears of joy of course, when I see who commented on my video.

Top Comment: Zoella- I love this video! Your makeup tips defiantly inspired me! Keep up the amazing videos!! xx

I have tons of comments on my video! Some saying that they loved it and that i should post more, some talking about Zoella asking if I know her and why she commented on my video, and the others were just random stuff like people asking where I was from and what I liked and stuff. After reading all the comments where people would ask about me I decided to film a Q&A video. I put my Twitter in the description box so everyone could follow me.

I looked and saw that I have over 1 thousand Twitter followers. My excitement grows as I scroll through all my mentions and see all the nice things people are saying about me. I didn't see any hate yet but I know I will. I then decide to tweet.

"@CaraCollins: Hey guys, I think I'm gonna do a Q&A for my next video. Ask me some questions and tweet #AskCara"

I decide to get a shower while I wait for some people to tweet me. I walk in the bathroom and the first thing I see when I walk in. My razor. I ignore it and think about all the people who are supporting me now. I can't let one girl who hates me make me stop living my life. Every decision I make is mine. Everyone has there right to have an opinion, even Jill. Just because I don't like her opinion doesn't mean I should kill myself. I smile as i think about today. It started off horrible.. Really horrible, and then suddenly it turned into the best day of my life. 

After I shower I blow dry my hair and straighten it, then I apply some makeup and put on a cute top. I set up my camera and start recording. A huge smile escapes my lips and I start my first Q&A video.

***END OF FLASHBACK***

I smile as I think of how it all started. It brings back so many good and bad memories. But I've learned that's it's more important to only focus on the good things in life. I check the time and see that it's 1 o'clock . My flight leaves in a hour. I grab my stuff and put everything in the car and drive to the airport.

When I get to the airport I get my ticket for California and get on the plane. Vidcon here I come!

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This is the first chapter of Behind The Lens! I hope you like it and if you do please vote and comment and share this with your friends.

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