The Girl Who Freed Herself

She was a mystery even to herself...

She had a certain charm to herself that those around her never could quite figure out. She was quiet, yet her soul would often scream through her sighs and the way she would look at the ground when she was feeling timorous. Her smile was constant, always looking for a door to someone's heart who would let it in. She loved to observe others and watch the way they communicate, even though she herself could barely hold a conversation. Her tongue was heavy laden and her creative brain would think so quickly that her mouth could not keep up. Nothing came out as a result. So in time she chose to become mute so she would spare herself embarrassment. But she still smiled. She always did.

She loved it when someone took the time to talk to her. How loved it made her feel. To not feel like a burden for once. She held on to those small moments when people went out of their way to notice her. Every smile, every glance--she held on to it all. These moments were rare, but all the more special to her. She kept on smiling.

She had trouble letting others in. She had put up a strong metal wall around herself and sought shelter behind its iron standings. She had been hurt so many times before. She knew people hurt, so she didn't want to take the chance. She would find herself wishing she could get to know people, but then she reminded herself that she would never enjoy close friendship with anyone other than herself. So she kept on smiling, this time with tears welling up behind her deep brown eyes.

One day she would be so fed up with the way she was living that she braved every attempt to open herself up to the world around her. Little by little she took down the iron wall she once called home and let the light back in. It hurt a lot at first, like slowly tearing off a band-aid from a blister, but with time she found it easier and easier to be herself with those around her. Her smile became more real, more genuine. More alive. She looked herself in the mirror and realized that she had finally, once and for all, tore down the walls that kept her from being...her.